For Better or Worse
by Kummerspeck
Summary: A romance in Rafael's point of view, beginning with his epiphany when Jane had mastitis. He wanted Jane more at her worst than anyone else at their best. And isn't marriage for better or worse?
1. Chapter 1

"I can hear you and I hate all of you!" We heard ring from her bedroom. Jane at her worst. Against my will, my heart warmed.

"I'll have my cellphone on all night. If she gets worse, if she needs anything at all, I'm a quick call or text away." I whispered to Alba and Xiomara. They nodded at me.

"We will. Now go to your gala, before your date gets jealous." Xiomara said. Ever since Michael hurt Mateo, she'd been a little more accommodating to my presence at the house. Alba pursed her lips at the mention of Jill.

Reluctantly I left, my head clouded with Jane. Apparently even at her worst she was endearing.

I got back out to my car. Jill was touching up her lipstick. "Everything okay in there?" She asked, almost reluctantly, as I hit a button and the engine roared to life.

"She has mastitis." I replied, unsure of how much information was appropriate. "But she's in good hands."

"Oh." Jill replied. "Tell me about the gala. What's the charity?"

I spent the rest of the drive telling her about Coping Together, their mission statement, and how my father had given generously to them for years.

I worried about Jane, about the fever. We finally arrived, and I handed the car over to an excited looking valet who looked too young to drive. I offered Jill my elbow, and we stopped for a photographer to capture our picture.

Almost immediately after entering the gala, we were swarmed by business associates and old family friends. I introduced Jill to a small group of my father's former associates while I talked to an old family friend.

"I hear congratulations are in order!" He exclaimed, clapping me on the back. "I hear you have a new son."

"You've heard right. Mateo just turned five months the other day."

He looked uncomfortable for a moment. "I was sorry to hear about you and the mother. The Commissioner said you two seemed well suited. Happy."

My smile at seeing an old friend became a grimace. I knew I needed to move on, I was trying to move on. But reminders of Jane were everywhere. How do you even begin to move on from The One? How do you see them without yearning to hold them? Who could possibly fill the gaping hole that would be left if I somehow managed to get Jane out of my heart?

My chest tightened. I wasn't over her. I could never be over her. I didn't want to let Jane out of my heart, my soul. She made me happier than I'd ever been. She made me feel so carefree, so alive. I wanted her at her more at her worst than I'd ever wanted anyone else at their best. Isn't that what marriage was-For better or worse?

I muttered some noncommittal reply, then looked over at Jill. Some time had clearly passed without me noticing. She was now charming a small group of socialites with a witty anecdote. She would probably make someone a great society wife. I just didn't want that.

I imagined that Jane was here. She'd be warm and charming. She'd tease me about caviar and shrimp tails. We'd dance, with her head under my chin and her soft body against mine. I'd hold her so close. I'd never let go. My heart ached again. My date broke me out of my reverie.

"Rafael? Hello? Where have you been all night?" Thinking about Jane.

"Sorry." I coughed. "Are you ready to leave?"

She smiled, a wicked, carnal smirk. Her eyes looked from my face to my groin and back, devouring me. It was then I realized it was only nine at night, what that implied about my intentions. I had to tell her.

We said our early goodnight, ignoring the nudging elbows and raised eyebrows. The valet brought my car around, and I opened her door for her. As I got in, she put her hand on my thigh. "We need to talk." I began. "This isn't working. We're not working."

Jill looked shocked. "What? But we've been having so much fun. I don't understand. I thought tonight..."

Internally I cringed. "I'm sorry. It's just not a good time."

"Not a good time?" She rolled her eyes. "Is there also something missing? It's not me it's you?" She sighed, looked out the window. "Look, is there someone else? It's not like we're exclusive. Just tell me."

"There's no one else. I'm just not in a place for a relationship. I thought I was, but I'm not." The car was quiet for a moment. She wasn't convinced, and it felt like a lie. I hated to lie. I ran a hand through my hair. "The truth is, I'm not over Jane. I thought I could be, I really tried. But I'm not."

She shrugged, still looking out the window. "I understand."

It was a long, uncomfortable ride home.

I sat on my couch an hour later, staring out the window at the blue sea. I watched the waves gently crash along the golden shore. I tried not to make a habit of sitting and thinking, it made a person morose. Jill had left the minute she could get out of the car.

I looked around my penthouse, then got up and wandered through the rooms one by one. It was beautiful and spacious, meticulously decorated, with huge closets and display areas. Three enormous bathrooms, four oversized bedrooms, and a dressing room and extra closet the size of a small apartment. I leaned against the doorway of the dressing room. Petra looked so natural here, doing her hair and make up, eternally putting on lotions. I tried to imagine Jane in here. Instead of applying make up or lotion, in my mind she was sitting on the bench, looking at me and laughing that the attached closet was bigger than her bedroom at home.

I meandered through the halls to the nursery. I raised my hand to the doorknob. A room that had always brought me comfort, imagining a tiny child in it. The child I would have "someday". But Mateo had never slept there. After he was born, the nursery felt like a sepulcher, filled with the ghosts of my past. It was filled with the miscarriages we'd had, still decorated by Petra for a baby who hadn't survived. I'd started keeping the door closed. I realized I was still holding the door, then dropped my hand and moved on without even opening it.

Finally I went to my bedroom. I thought about when I asked Jane to move in. She was so beautiful, so charming, so sweet. So completely not ready. It launched a doomed proposal, a fight, a break up. I lost her. I ran my hands through my hair.

You idiot. My inner voice taunted me. You asked her to move in with you from your former marital bed? With your ex wife still living in the building? You thought she would just move into the penthouse Petra decorated, designed, and lived in with you? And you thought she would do it within six months of knowing you?

I slowly plodded back to the living room. I felt uneasy. The penthouse may have been right for me once, but it wasn't any more. It was time for a change.

I sat down at the bar, imagined my perfect life. I saw Jane and Mateo playing in the front yard, behind a clichéd white picket fence. We would have a nice big lot, in a safe neighborhood. Your traditional upper middle class suburbia. Somewhere we'd both be comfortable. I'd come home from work at a reasonable hour, and they'd be so excited to see me.

We'd go inside. It would be big without being grandiose, elegant while being warm and inviting. We would have a huge kitchen. I stopped for a second. Xo and Rogelio would probably have moved back in together. I imagined Alba in the kitchen with us. It felt right. Our house would need an in law suite.

Would it have a pool? My mind involuntarily flashed back to Jane naked in the hotel pool, wrapped around me, begging me to make love to her. Yes, there would be a pool.

A smile cracked my face. It had been a long time since I went out cruising, looking at family homes. I grabbed my keys and headed to the parking garage. I had accepted the wrong future, again. I wasn't going to lose Jane. I was going to fight for us and our family. This time, though, I was going to do it smarter, slower. She was going to steer the ship, I was just going to be there with her.

I drove around, not really paying close attention to where I was going. Most of the houses were dark on the quiet residential street. I absently wondered about the families inside. I didn't know what it was like to be in bed by ten at night, to have a family breakfast before school and work. But I so badly wanted to. I wanted to wake up with Jane every morning, fall asleep with her every night. I wanted us to put Mateo to bed together, reading to him until he couldn't keep his eyes open, kissing him good night before retreating to our bedroom together. I'd read the new pages of her book, she'd listen to stories about my day. I'd hold her, kiss her, tell her how beautiful she is, tell her how much I love her.

Just as I started to imagine what it would be like to make love to her every night, I saw it. Our home. It was perfect, right down to the picket fence. I stopped the car, grabbed the phone from my pocket. As if it were fated, it was half way between Jane's house and the Marbella, and it had a huge sign out front proclaiming loudly that it was for sale.

I stared at the listing pictures, transfixed. It needed updating, but that just meant Jane and I could make it our own. Assuming I could get her back. One of the rooms in particular caught my eye. I could barely wait to show Jane, but I knew I had to.

Reluctantly, I left 'our' house. I checked the dashboard clock, it was about ten thirty. Soon I found myself outside Jane's. I had to see her, even if it was just a peek while she slept. Xiomara was sitting on the porch swing. She waved as my car pulled up. I took a deep breath in, then smiled at her. For a moment, things were tense as I got out of my car and came up the walk. Xo's smile was forced, then it cracked into a concerned look. She patted the bench next to her.

"Come sit." She said. She paused. "It's early to be back from a date."

"We broke up." I said, hoping she would drop it.

"Really? Why?" Xiomara asked, but her tone heavily implied she already knew.

"It just wasn't working." I said unconvincingly. "We fizzled out."

"Hmm." She replied, one eyebrow raised. "Let's finish our talk. I've been thinking about this a lot and I have to... Well... Apologize. Again."

"Apologize?" I asked, surprised. "For what?"

She looked down, then looked back at me. "For being rude. For refusing to get to know you. For being so sure Michael was the right choice for Jane. I was wrong. I see that now."

I was pleasantly surprised by her admission. "It's okay. You're Jane's mother, you just want her to be happy. Michael literally broke laws for you all and saved Alba from being deported. I'm sure he seemed like the better guy from where you were standing."

She gave me a small smile, but it quickly vanished. "I still think you and Jane see the world differently. I'm still not sure you're the right guy for her, you know."

I nodded, crossing my arms across my chest. "Well, I'd be disappointed if you suddenly decided I was good enough for her. I've hurt her twice now. I have a lot of work to do to fix that."

"You do." Xo agreed. "But I don't see you giving up. Or messing up like that again. So if she forgives you, if she gives you a third chance-and those are big ifs-I'll keep an open mind." She paused. "Come inside. I think Jane might be up."

We both stood. "Thank you." I said to her. "It means a lot to have your tentative support. It's been five months and I can't get her out of my head. And I tried. Really I did. Even at her worst, she's all I can think about."

She smiled then, a real one, and let me inside. She said her good nights, then headed off to bed. I sat for a few minutes, taking in the living room. It was small but warm. The couch was so comfortable. I'd wondered before why my three thousand dollar designer couches weren't this comfortable. After Mateo's birth I'd spent a lot of time sleeping in this room. I'd grown to feel surprisingly comfortable here.

"Hey." I heard from the doorway.

"Hey." I answered, cautiously. "How are you feeling?"

"Better." She smiled sheepishly. "Sorry about earlier. I guess it's a fever thing? So. Where's your date?"

"She was tired. We left early." I wasn't ready for more questions about why. Not when Jane still wasn't over Michael, not when she wasn't ready to be back together. Life is long, she'd said. I could afford to be patient.

My answer seemed to placate her, and we landed on the safe topic of pumping. It seemed obvious to me that she should stop, but she was deep in the clutches of what I assumed was Mommy Guilt. After a little back and forth, we agreed she would stop.

"That's such a relief!" She leaned back into the couch. "Ugh. It will take a month to stop, but I'm almost done!" She put her hand over mine. "Thank you, Rafael. You're the best co parent a girl could hope for."

I smiled at her. I imagined us having these conversations in our house, kissing her soundly and bringing her to bed. I was so tired of being alone, so tired of living without her. But it wasn't the right time, so I waited.

A/n: In the first draft, this section was a whopping 500 words. Now it's 2400 and there's a minimum of two more chapters coming. Probably more. Next chapter : Thanksgiving! Because who doesn't love holiday fluff.

As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts, especially your criticisms! -K


	2. Chapter 2

One Month Later  
Thanksgiving dawned bright and beautiful. It was pleasantly warm, and I had an excuse to spend the entire day at Jane's. I flew through my work out and shower, got my work requirements out of the way in an hour, and was knocking on their door by 9am.  
I was greeted by a flour dusted Jane, who handed me Mateo and wordlessly retreated back into the kitchen. There was enough food being prepared for thirty people at least.  
"Hi, Mateo! Daddy's here!" I exclaimed, before whispering conspiratorially "Let's go do some tummy time on your activity mat so Daddy has an excuse to look at Mommy." He smiled at me, patting my nose.  
We played on the mat for a while, ate some impossibly tiny apple cubes, back to the play mat, back to the food. We played peek a boo, read a book about animal noises, ate more apple pieces. I couldn't get enough time with my son. He was perfect in every way, I couldn't imagine loving him any more. I couldn't wait until we could all be together. I had to enjoy today, because eventually it would be time for me to leave him. Again.  
Mateo, almost as if he noticed my sadness, offered me a chubby hand of apple cubes. I smiled at him, said thank you, and gobbled up his whole hand, sucking the apple pieces out of his fist. He screamed with laughter, and it was infectious. Soon I was laughing. I looked over my shoulder and caught Jane watching us. There was a dreamy look in her eyes.  
"Look, Mateo." I whispered. "Mommy is looking at us. I think she likes us." Mateo gurgled, then yawned.  
"He's probably hungry and ready for his nap." Jane said, appearing behind me. Our fingers brushed as she handed me his bottle. The sparks, the magnetism was still there. Not that I was surprised.  
I pretended not to notice them. "Thanks." I said, smiling at her. I picked up Mateo, cleaned off his hands and face, and brought him to Jane's room for his nap. We sat down in the rocker, and I quietly sang him Rogelio's ridiculous if very endearing song as he drank his bottle. He smiled a little as if to say "Silly grandpa" and his eyes fluttered shut. I kissed his sweet little forehead. "I love you." I told him. "You're the best surprise I've ever had. You and your mother are the best things ever to happen to me."  
I heard a small squeak by the door, and looked up to see Jane scurrying away. I smiled to myself. Maybe today was the day. Something to be thankful for.  
While Mateo napped, I joined the ladies in the kitchen. "What can I help with?" I asked. First they all stopped. Then they laughed. Then they laughed harder.  
Finally, Jane managed to subdue her giggling. "Sorry, sorry." She said, fanning herself. "Have you cooked before? What can you do?"  
"Of course I can cook!" I said with a false wounded expression. "Abs are made in the kitchen."  
Alva muttered something that sounded suspiciously like "Puedo ver eso"-"I can see that", sending the women back into a fit of laughter.  
Xiomara handed me a bowl, a knife, some lettuce, and some vegetables. "Newbies start with salad. If you do well, you get promoted to making mashed potatoes."  
I raised an eyebrow and smiled, taking the items. "And if I don't do well?"  
"Entonces vamos a reír de ti cada Thanksgiving por el resto de nuestras vidas." Then we'll make fun of you every Thanksgiving for the rest of our lives, Alba said brightly.  
"So no pressure, then." I winked at her. Jane rolled her eyes, and everyone went to work.  
As I carefully washed and cut veggies, I reflected that no one had disagreed with her. They all planned on my being here forever. It was very heartwarming. Even if it was just for Mateo's sake, even if everything went wrong, I'd have a family.  
I finished the salad, and put it on the table for inspection. "Very nice." Jane said, patting my arm and smiling. "Looks like you earned yourself some mashed potatoes."  
"I aim to please." I murmured, smiling back at her. Her cheeks flushed slightly. She bit her bottom lip. Just then, a small, reedy cry came from Jane's room. "Mateo's up. Should I get him?"  
She blinked a few times, stumbled back a step. "No, I've got him. You make those potatoes." She grabbed a bottle from the fridge and left.  
I grabbed the pre cooked potatoes from the stove and put them in the mixer. As I was adding the butter and milk, Alba came beside me and began chopping some apples.  
"Hay un complot tan triste en Passion Juana esta semana. Marcello amaba Juana, pero Juana recogió Miguel. Miguel resultó ser un villano, y Juana tuvo que reparar su corazón roto." There is a sad plot on Passion Juana this week. Marcello loved Juana, but Juana picked Miguel. Miguel turned out to be a villain, and Juana had to repair her broken heart.  
She looked at me conspiratorially, made sure I was following, then continued. "Sabes lo que pienso? Creo que Juana tiene sentimientos por Marcello." Do you know what I think? I think Juana has feelings for Marcello.  
I smiled, continuing to watch the mashed potatoes as I prepared them. "I must have missed that show, I don't seem to remember that title." I replied. Alba smiled, then I continued. "I hope Juana has feelings for Marcello. I'm sure Marcello never stopped loving her. I'm sure he has a huge plan to get her back and to marry her. But don't tell anyone, I'm sure it's a secret."  
Alba rubbed my arm, then picked up her plate of neatly sliced apples and left. I fished mashing the potatoes, and set the bowl with the other finished food. Just then Jane came by with Mateo in his stroller.  
"Want to go for a walk?" She asked. "We have some time."  
"Yeah, of course." I replied. "Let's go." We began our leisurely stroll around the neighborhood, quietly. Pointing out birds and dogs, looking at the houses.  
Finally, Jane broke the silence. "My grandma says the neighborhood isn't what it used to be."  
I tried my hardest to keep a straight face. "Oh?"  
"Yeah." She replied, fixing Mateo's hat. "Ever since most of the houses switched over to rentals. I mean, when I was younger we rode our bikes a few miles in any direction. Now? I'm not sure I want Mateo learning to ride a bike on this street. There's always someone speeding!"  
I nodded, thinking about 'our' neighborhood. Soon. "Yeah. So what was it like when you grew up here? What were the best parts?"  
Jane smiled as warm memories washed over her. "We played foursquare and hopscotch in the street, we'd bike to the nearest playground and be home by dusk. You know, normal stuff."  
I shook my head. "I don't know, remember? I grew up in hotels and vacationed in real houses. It's hard to make friends when everyone leaves after a week or two. And let's face it, my father's hotels weren't exactly Disney World."  
Jane stopped for a second and looked at me sadly. "I can't imagine."  
"I mean, I had Luisa." I quickly added. "And I had plenty of friends at the schools I attended."  
Jane brought out a teasing smile. "The lady doth protest to much, me thinks." I loved just talking with her. Watching her shake her head and laugh. She was so genuine, always open. "We should head back." She said. "It's almost time to eat!"  
On the walk back we kept it light. "So," I started. "What's your favorite Thanksgiving food."  
"Stuffing." She responded immediately. "Followed by Abuela's apple pie. They're so good she used to sell them when money was really tight."  
"I'll be sure to save room, then." I smiled. "And I'll also be sure not to bring up money at the table again."  
Jane groaned, leaning her head on the stroller. "Don't remind me." She paused, her forehead wrinkling. "Actually, speaking of Ma," My heart tripled in speed. Had she told Jane about our talk? "She said she saw you and Abuela whispering together in the kitchen. Is something going on?"  
"Uh, she was just telling me about a telenovela she thought I might be interested in."  
Jane looked seriously suspicious, but we were mercifully at the door. The smells from the kitchen were incredible. Xo ushered us in, handing me a stack of dishes.  
"We're only twenty minutes from dinner! Jane, get the baby ready. Rafael, set the table."  
I took them, then went to work. Moments after I finished, platter after heaping platter of food was brought to the table. I got Mateo's portion ready, and Jane handed him over so she could help bring even more food to the table. Just as Alba nodded at the laden table with approval, I saw Jane send a quick text. I raised my eyebrows in question, and she shook her head. Everyone sat down and food was passed.  
Finally, it was time to say our thanks. Unwillingly, my eyes got a little misty. How could I articulate everything I was thankful for? The beautiful woman by my side, our gorgeous son, this warm, incredible home where everyone was always welcome, finally having a family I felt secure with.  
Everyone was staring at me expectantly. "I'm thankful for this. All of it. So much." Was all I could get out. Jane caught my glance. She looked touched. I wanted to take her aside and keep talking. I'm thankful for you. I'm thankful for how you've changed my life. I'm thankful for your thoughtfulness, for your smile, your laugh, your everything. You are my everything. I love you. I've loved you for so long, I'll love you so long as we both shall live if you'll let me.  
Suddenly there was a knock on the door. Jane hopped up. "It's probably Petra. We forgot Mateo's lovey."  
I raised an eyebrow at her. I knew there were three loveys in the house. A moment later Jane returned with my ex wife, grabbing her a plate. I stood, giving Petra my chair. She looked a little flustered, but pleased. Abuela immediately started filling her plate, speaking rapid fire about feeding the babies.  
Petra blushed. "Thank you, but I can only really keep down bread and butter."  
Alba continued to talk about feeding the babies, and I went to grab Jane's computer chair. As I turned around to bring the chair back out to the table, I was surprised by Jane in the door way.  
"I hope you don't mind I invited her in. She just seemed so sad and alone when I saw her this week, and-" She stopped as my smile grew. "What?"  
"Thank you. Despite being my seriously crazy ex wife, she's apparently going to be the mother of two of my children. So thank you for making her feel welcome. Especially after what her mother did to Alba."  
"I couldn't imagine being alone on Thanksgiving." Jane said simply. "And we're all doing this parenting thing together. And I think she could really use a friend."  
I paused for a second. "I'm so thankful for you, Jane. I couldn't imagine what this year would have been like without you. So thank you."  
Jane nodded, and was about to respond when we heard Rogelio call to her from the other room. "Jane! Jane! Come back, I must regale you with a story from my recent travels!"  
"We better hurry." I teased her, picking up the chair. We went back out to the dining room, and enjoyed the rest of dinner, then seconds, then thirds, then dessert, then second dessert.  
By the end I nearly felt ill. I couldn't believe how fast the hours had passed. Jane returned from putting Mateo to bed, and we were all given instructions.  
"Okay, Jane and Rafael, you're on dishes. Ma, you and I will clear the table and put the food away. Rogelio-"  
"I will entertain Petra and distract her from her morning sickness!" He finished for her, with a wild hand gesture.  
"Oh, I can help!" Petra volunteered. She smiled what looked like a real smile to me. Not honeyed or cloying.  
"No, usted se sienta y descansa." No, you sit and rest, Alba confirmed.  
"Thank you." Petra replied politely, moving towards the couch. Rogelio followed her, telling her all about Los Hombres Locos. She seemed genuinely interested. Jane looked at me, confused. I shrugged, and as we stood up to start the dishes, I whispered "Your guess is as good as mine" in her ear. She giggled.  
"I'll wash, you dry. How did you like your first Villenueva Thanksgiving?" Jane asked, filling the sink with water.  
"Amazing, honestly. I didn't know Thanksgiving could be so enjoyable."  
"If you liked this, wait until Christmas." Jane replied, a twinkle in her eye. "Or better yet, Easter!" Guilt squeezed at me. It was my fault we hadn't been at Easter last year. Seeing my dark expression, Jane backpedaled. "Last year doesn't count, Rogelio's mom was here. Abuela and Mom talked for days about how awkward it was. This year it's going to be amazing!"  
I caught her eye and smiled with her. "Yeah. I'm really looking forward to it."  
"So, what ended up being your favorite dish?" I paused drying the dish I was holding to think. "Don't stop! We'll be here all night!"  
I laughed with her. "Definitely the mashed potatoes. They were inspired." I said with a straight face. She flicked soapy water at me. "Hey! Hey! Okay. Apple pie. Hands down. I think I ate almost half the pie myself!" She handed me another dish. "Though the mashed potatoes were very good."  
Jane looked over at the full dish rack, then bit her lip. "Okay, enough dishes for now. Can I ask you a question?"  
"Uh, sure." I responded, surprised by her sudden change in direction.  
"What ever happened with you and Jill?"  
My heart quickened, but on the outside I gave her a smooth smile. "We fizzled out."  
She clearly didn't believe me. "No way. I ran into her at the grocery store, and it was super awkward. Definitely not 'fizzled out' awkward."  
Here it was. Now. Finally. I turned fully to her. "Do you remember the night I realized you are actually a very mean person?"  
"Oh my God, seriously?" She looked a little incredulous.  
"Anyway, as cranky and stinky and mean as you were-"  
"I hope this story has a point!" Jane exclaimed.  
"-I realized that I would rather still be with you at your worst. So Jill wasn't the person."  
Jane fanned herself slightly, and opened the window. "It's getting hot in here, huh?"  
She looked back at me. Her eyes bored into mine, her breath was coming in little gasps. "Go on a date with me. Just one. Say yes."  
She paused, just long enough to terrify me. "Yes." She said quietly, and a slow smile caressed her lips.  
My heart went through the roof. I wanted to pull her into my arms and kiss her. I wanted to cheer, to thank whoever was listening for this chance to make my family whole.  
"I'm willing to go as slow as you want. I won't even kiss you until you okay it. Where should we go for our first date?"  
She thought for a second. "Next Friday is my grad school holiday party, and I need to impress this amazing author I want to be my advisor. You should come."  
"Done." I agreed. "And if it goes well, which it will, I'd like to take you and Mateo on a Saturday morning brunch date."  
Jane laughed. "I'm sure Abuela won't mind you crashing on the couch. Especially after that mysterious talk you two had earlier."  
"I have no idea what you're talking about." I insisted with a smirk.  
"I'm sure." She teased.  
Things had changed. Our conversation was light and fun. It felt so easy, so effortless. There would be hard times ahead, but for right now everything was perfect, and the future was full of promise.  
And for that, I gave thanks.  
A/n: Next chapter, the date! Drop me a comment if you like what you're reading, or if you have any ideas. Or if you hate it and have some constructive criticism. I welcome all feedback.  
Merry Christmas! -K


	3. Chapter 3

One Week and One Day Later  
The last week had been a surprising challenge. I wanted to romance her hard and fast, showering her with flowers, taking her to the best restaurants, kissing her until she couldn't think straight. But I resisted. Kissing her until she couldn't think straight certainly hadn't worked in my favor last time, and she despised my inclination to 'throw money at things', so even if I wasn't sure that was a fair description, I certainly was going to respect her opinion and avoid doing it.  
Not being affectionate was the hardest part. We'd be taking Mateo out for a walk, or talking on the couch, or having a meal together, and I was constantly distracted by my urge to hold her hand, to grab her and kiss her soundly, to tell her how much I loved her. I'd already decided the wisest choice of action was to let her set the pace. She'd done it before, I recalled fondly, thinking about being 'cleared for kissing'. As hard as it was, I was going to follow her lead.  
Seeing Michael on Black Friday had thrown us both for a bit of a loop, but we got past it. As he walked away I walked up behind her, put my hand on her shoulder.  
"You okay?" I'd asked.  
"Yeah," Jane replied. "I'm okay."  
Later, during Mateo's nap, I brought it up again.  
"Listen, I know you weren't fine earlier. I get it. I just want you to know you can talk to me. About anything."  
She shook her head vehemently. "No, really. I'm fine."  
I sighed. "Jane, I know you only agreed to a first date, but if we want this, us, to work long term, we need to be able to talk about things like this. When I decided to divorce Petra, I was willing to pay her an extra ten thousand dollars to make her go away faster. I did that because it was hard for me to look at her. Even though I'd been sure our marriage was dead for over a year, seeing her still dredged up a lot of hurt, and pain, and anger. Especially anger. So you don't have to hide your hurt from me. I get it."  
Jane sniffed, a small tear starting down her cheek. "I just expected to marry him, you know? And even when he was supposed to just be a friend, he was always there. My family still talks about him in the present tense. I just thought, especially after that stupid, drunken kiss, that maybe he would be around forever. And he hates me, and I'm not sure if that's even fair because I should be mad at him. And I know we can't ever be real friends, I know he'd always want more, and with how he treats you, it would just be wrong for everyone."  
I gently rubbed her arm. "Well first of all, I heard that kiss was both epic and the best kiss ever. It was important to you, just like him. You don't need to talk it down for my sake. I don't expect you to have forgotten the connection you used to have. It's okay. I-" I paused, almost letting an I love you slip out. "I'll always be here. To listen, to talk to. Whatever you need."  
Jane was quiet for a moment, I assumed evaluating what I'd said.  
"Was it really hard, when you left Petra? It never looked like it bothered you."  
Well that wasn't the response I'd expected. "Yes." I replied honestly. "It really hurt. For a long time. Sometimes it still does. I was looking at my December calendar, and for some reason one of the dates made me feel like I was forgetting something. When I realized it was Petra's fake birthday, I was angry. But the more time that passes, the less angry I get. The more time that goes by, the less it will hurt."  
Jane nodded, smiling at me. "Rafael." She paused. "Thank you. It means a lot to me."  
I wanted to hold her hand, wanted to kiss her until she forgot about him. But that wouldn't have been right. So I waited.  
The morning of our date was a nightmare. I was awoken at four because a drunk VIP was insisting his five thousand dollar a night suite meant he wasn't beholden to pool hours. I dropped a ten pound weight on my foot while lifting in the gym, the hot water heater for my penthouse had apparently died during the night so my shower was a frigid ice bath, and when I got to my office I was informed that Petra couldn't make an appointment because she couldn't stop vomiting. So in addition to convincing someone to get married here, I had to worry about my ex wife and pending children.  
I worked feverishly through lunch, trying to get everything done. Just after two my phone buzzed.  
Can't wait for tonight.  
I smiled, replying.  
Neither can I.  
The rest of the day seemed to go better. The VIP's pride was assuaged with a lie about the pool hours, the wedding decided to book with us, and Jane couldn't wait for our date.  
I carefully selected a flattering but not obscenely tight shirt and my usual fitted dress pants, and threw pajamas and a second outfit in a small bag. I looked at the clock, noticing I still had thirty minutes. I quickly looked over the cheat sheet Jane had emailed me about the people I'd be meeting tonight. I was going to impress her.  
I pulled up to her front door exactly five minutes early. I grabbed the bouquet of camellias off the passenger seat, and walked up to the front door. I knocked, then waited. A moment later Jane answered, looking bemused. "You haven't knocked in months!" She said, laughing and reaching for the flowers.  
"Ah, but this is a first date. So I had to knock, and because it's a first date these flowers aren't for you." I winked at her.  
"You brought flowers for someone else to our date? This is going to be the worst date ever." She teased.  
"Jane? Que está en la puerta?" Who is at the door? Alba asked, walking into the room. "Ah, Rafael. Trajiste flores!" You brought flowers!  
"For you." I said, handing the camellias to her. "Thank you for watching Mateo for us. I promise to get Jane home at a reasonable hour."  
She laughed, taking them. Jane rolled her eyes. "I'll see you tonight, Abuela. We have to go. Thanks again!" She said, hustling us both out the door and into my car. "So, did you read my email?"  
I smiled, starting the car. "Check under your seat."  
She looked perplexed, but reached around until she found the stack of flashcards I'd made. "Are these?"  
"I made flashcards for tonight. I've been studying for three days. I'm ready. Let's get you that advisor."  
The date did not go quite as well as I had hoped. We entered the spacious room, and Jane scoped it out.  
"She's not here." Jane said, disbelievingly. "Maybe she's in the bathroom?"  
But she wasn't. We stayed the entire party, and she didn't show up. I charmed Jane's friends, especially that awful one-Wesley? But Jane spent the party watching the door.  
Finally people started to depart. Jane drained her second glass of wine. "I guess she's not coming. I'm sorry I wasted our second first date."  
I smiled at her. "Hey, it's okay. We still have brunch tomorrow." I gently grabbed her hand and held it in mine. "And no time spent with you will ever be a waste to me."  
Jane smiled, still holding my hand. "Thank you, Rafael. You're sweet. And yummy."  
I barely held back my laughter. "And you're in rough shape for a girl that's had two drinks. Come on, let me get you home."  
Jane giggled, leading me out to the car. We got in, and started for home. "What were you like in high school?" She asked suddenly. "Handsome football player? Running your way through all the cheerleaders?"  
I laughed. "Varsity tennis. That's what got me into weight lifting, an exercise related chronic knee injury. And no, no cheerleaders." She narrowed her eyes. "Okay, very few cheerleaders. Where did that come from?"  
Jane looked out the window. "The party made me think about my high school reunion. Neither went like I envisioned. Which made me wonder about what you were like in highschool."  
"I'm sorry about your reunion." I said softly. "I should have been there."  
"It's okay." She replied. "If we're still together, you can make it up to me at my ten year reunion. But brunch better be good tomorrow."  
"Brunch will be incredible. Try not to get sloppy on first date part two." I teased her.  
"I am not sloppy!" Jane cried indignantly. "I'm maybe a little tipsy. Maybe."  
We pulled up to her house, and I opened her door like a gentleman. "Thank you, sir." She smiled at me, before leading us into the house. It was dark, everyone must have turned in early. Jane paused. "Do you want to split some ice cream with me?"  
"Sure. What do you have?"  
Jane searched the freezer. "Mint marshmallow or Chocolate caramel cookie." She looked at me seriously. "There is a right answer."  
I took the chocolate caramel cookie from her hand. "I'll take this one. You can have that joke."  
"Hey!" She exclaimed before modulating her voice. "We can share that one."  
"Okay." I said with a grin. Jane came and sat with me.  
"So what's the plan for tomorrow?" She asked, digging into the carton with her spoon.  
"It's a surprise." I tried to get a spoonful, but Jane blocked me.  
"No way! Tell me what's going on and then you can have some."  
"I'm not telling you anything." I found myself grinning. I spent a lot of time smiling now.  
"Then no ice cream for you." She said, lightly rapping my knuckles with her spoon. She scooped the last bit out of the bottom and popped the spoon into her mouth.  
For one second I imagined crushing my mouth to hers, stealing it with my tongue. I imagined running my hands through her hair, over her body, covering her with kisses and touches until she called out my name. But once again, I restrained myself.  
I came out of my reverie when I felt her head leaning against my shoulder. I looked at her. Jane was asleep. I smiled at her, ran my thumb lightly over her cheek, her lip. Then I leaned back, and enjoyed slowly drifting off to sleep with her beside me.  
I woke up to a deliciously warm body pressed sensually against mine. I could feel her rhythmic breathing, could smell her enticing scent. I wrapped my arms tighter around her, imagined spending all day in bed with her. Slowly I cracked open an eye. It was surprisingly light out. What time was it? I checked my watch.  
"Jane... Jane! We have to get up! Or appointment is in twenty minutes!" I said, rubbing her arm.  
"What?" Jane said, groggily. "What time is it?"  
"It's almost ten! Quick! You get changed, I'll get Mateo."  
We both jumped up from the couch, running to her room. There was a note in Mateo's crib.  
Thought you guys looked tired, took Mateo to the park. -Xo  
"Ah, I must have forgotten to tell her about your surprise today!"  
"It's okay" I assured her. "It will be just as good with just you there."  
She smiled at me. I was distracted by her sweetness, by her soft lips, her warm eyes. I left the room so she could change her dress, and we were in the car five minutes later.  
"So what is this surprise?" Jane asked, teasingly.  
"Wait and see." I responded, grinning.  
We pulled up in front of our home.  
"What's this?" Jane asked.  
"I'm thinking about making an offer." I replied.  
"I don't understand. It doesn't look like your kind of house." She responded.  
That's because it's for us, for our family. "It's kind of half way between your house the Marbella. I'm not asking you to live here with me because I know that this is just our first date, but... I do want your opinion." I looked at her earnestly. She looked a little choked up. My heart was in my throat.  
"I love it. So much."  
I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. "Good. Because we have a showing right now."  
"What?" Jane replied. "Really?"  
"Yes. The realtor is inside. Let's go." I couldn't stop my face splitting grin. She was considering it. She didn't look scared or uncomfortable, just excited.  
We exited the car and walked to the front door. It swung open almost immediately. "Rafael!" The realtor almost yelled, clapping me on the back. "Good to see you again. This must be Jane."  
Jane smiled politely. "Jane, this is Don. He's a good friend of the family."  
Don smiled back. "So you two get looking!"  
We walked through the grand entryway, towards the kitchen. "Rafael, look at the kitchen! It's huge! And the living room is even bigger!" Jane whispered excitedly. "Look at the woodwork in the dining room. It's amazing."  
"You seem to like it." I replied quietly. "How do you feel about carpet versus hardwood? I think I'd like to rip the downstairs carpeting out and have it replaced. And I'm thinking the kitchen needs to be redone. Possibly the walls painted, too."  
Jane nodded. "I think hardwood would be gorgeous, but obviously it's up to you since it's your house!"  
I gave her a sheepish smile. "I'm actually pretty terrible at interior design. If I buy this place, I was hoping you, your mom, and Abuela could help me decide on the renovations."  
Jane laughed. "If you're sure that's what you want, I bet they'd love to help."  
She didn't look suspicious at all. Good. I looked at the door to the room I wanted to surprise Jane with, then distracted her by pointing out the in law suite.  
"There's two bedrooms, a kitchenette, two bathrooms and a living room. For if your family ever wanted to stay over?" I finished, lamely. She smiled. I grabbed her hand and started moving towards the stairs. "Let's check out upstairs."  
We looked at the four smaller bedrooms, which were still spacious. Jane gasped at a green room with a jungle theme and enormous windows.  
"Can you imagine Mateo in here?"  
I squeezed her hand. "I can."  
Jane lightly touched the wall as she left the room. "Rafael!" I heard her shout excitedly a second later. "The bathroom is an aquarium!"  
I smiled, following her. The shower and bath were made of glass, and the entire room was covered in blue tile with fish decorations. It was hideous, but a child would love it. Mateo would love it.  
"Admit it. It's pretty cool." Jane said with a straight face.  
I laughed. "Mateo's going to love it."  
We moved in to the master suite. It was palatial, with a sitting area and fireplace, a massive oversized bed, two walk in closets, and a spa bathroom.  
Unfortunately, the entire thing was pink. The walls, the ceiling, the chandelier, the carpet, even the fireplace façade. Jane walked in, staring at the place. She walked to the bathroom threshold, and started laughing uncontrollably.  
"Rafael, there are three pink chandeliers in this bathroom. The jacuzzi is heart shaped!" She was bent over, holding her knees, convulsing with laughter. "There's a mirror over the tub, and a pink bidet."  
Tears were streaming down her face. "So we should probably renovate this love nest." I said, grinning. "So what's your final verdict?"  
Jane finally got her laughter under control. "I love it. I really, really love it. I do."  
"I do, too." I grabbed her hand. "Let's tell the realtor."  
For one second I thought she was going to kiss me. I wanted to kiss her. But she didn't. "Okay." She said, pulling me out the room and towards the stairs.  
Don was waiting for us at the bottom. "So?" He prompted, with a smile.  
"We'll take it." I answered, looking at Jane. "Let's go in with the offer we discussed earlier."  
"It's a strong offer." Don nodded. "I'll let you know."  
We walked outside the house, and Jane stopped me. "Rafael, what does this amazing house cost?"  
"That's the best part." I smiled. "I'll be renting out the penthouse, so I'll actually be making money by living here. It's a financially strong decision."  
Jane's smile returned. "You're ridiculous."  
We got into the car, exhilarated. I couldn't stop smiling. Jane's eyes lingered on our house as we pulled away. But the best part of all was the feeling of her hand tightly holding mine as I drove.

A/n: I had the worst time writing this behemoth. I'm so ready for them to start fooling around! So ready that I've already written chapter four around it. And chapter six.


	4. Chapter 4

I showed up at Jane's house with no warning. My heart was pounding, my palms were sweating, I felt sick. Xo answered the door.

"Hey, what's going on? Are you okay?" She looked concerned.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just need to see Mateo." My voice rasped. My smile was feeble at best. I wanted a drink, but I needed to see my son.

"They're back in her room." Xiomara said softly. "And whatever it is, it's going to be okay."

I nodded and went back to Jane's room. She was sitting on the bed, playing with our son's tiny feet. It warmed my heart. Jane would never sell our son. She looked up. Her face split into a huge grin. "Look, Mateo! It's Daddy!" She looked at my expression and her face clouded. "Rafael? What's wrong? Did everything go okay with your sister?"

I walked over to the bed and sat down with them, lovingly lifting Mateo into my arms, inhaling his sweet baby scalp. "My mother was there. She said she wanted to talk to me, tell me things I didn't know."

Jane gently placed her hand on my shoulder. "What did you say?"

I shook my head. "I told her the truth. I have a son and I would never sell him, not for any reason, not for any amount of money." I looked down at our now sleeping six month old. It amazed me how much he could sleep. Everything about him amazed me. "I can't imagine doing what she did. There's no reason, no excuse. She doesn't deserve the chance to explain herself." I said, bitterly.

Jane looked at me with a little frown, obviously thinking. She lifted Mateo from my arms, put him in his crib, then grabbed my hand and led me to the living room. We sat together on the couch.

"First off, Ma left for Rogelio's and Abuela is at work, so you don't need to worry about anyone listening in. Second, you know how I generally feel about forgiveness. Especially about forgiving family. But this, I think, is different. On the other hand, you and Luisa are so close, you and a half brother could be, in time. As important as family is to you, I can't imagine you choosing to live the rest of your life not knowing him. And if you want to meet him, your mother is going to be part of the equation. I don't have the answers. I know that I'm not qualified to handle issues this big. Maybe this is something that needs a counselor."

She looked contrite. I gently put my hand on her face, rubbed her cheek with my thumb. "You're right. Will you come with me?"

She looked surprised. "Of course." She murmured, then stopped. Slowly, she raised her head to mine, kissing me on the cheek. Her hands came up to my face, turning my head so she could kiss me on the lips. They were warm, comforting. Slowly my hands reached for her waist.

Our kisses were gentle at first, tentative. It had been so long since our last kiss, but it felt to natural, so right, so familiar. Warmth spread through me as Jane made a small humming sound and deepened the kiss. Her hands ran through my hair, tugging softly. I couldn't control myself, I had to touch her. I ran my hands up and down her sides, glorying in the feel of her soft body. It was better than I remembered, better than my imagination. She leaned harder against me, pushing her body closer to mine.

As we continued our kisses became frantic, frenetic. Our tongues touched and I effortlessly lifted her onto my lap. Her arms wrapped around my neck, my hands rubbed up and down her thighs, before finally daring to firmly grab her incredible behind. She moaned, loudly.

"Ah, Rafael." It was unimaginably sexy. I took the break from her mouth to trail kisses down her throat, on her collarbones. Her fingers clutched my shoulders, her hips grinded against mine. The air was hot, thick with our desire. I couldn't think of anything past her skin, her moans, her body writhing against me. I pulled her harder to my groin, reveled in the friction. I moved my hands to her face, looked at her. Her half lidded eyes, her flushed cheeks, her rosy and swollen lips. I crushed our mouths together again. I felt her hands at the collar of my shirt, tugging at the buttons.

She pulled her mouth from mine, looked at me, then started kissing and nibbling on my neck. Her hands were in my shirt, her nails raking over my chest, my abs, my back. I could barely think with lust crowding my head. Her mouth was slowly descending to my chest. My hands slid from her face to her neck, trailing over the sides of her breasts, caressing her waist, back to her rear.

"Mm, Rafael!" Jane's voice was pleading as she rocked her hips against mine. The juncture of her thighs was hot against my erection, her wonton movements sending flames through my body. She felt exquisite, and there were still my pants and her panties between us.

"You're so incredible." I said hoarsely. "I love you."

Shit. She froze. I froze. Then there came a bellow from the door.

"What do you think you are doing to my daughter? In her grandmother's home?" Rogelio and Xo stood in the doorway, and I knew exactly why we hadn't heard them walk in. I took stock of our situation. Jane was straddling me, half buried in my shirt. Her skirt was pulled up almost to her waist. At least my erection was gone.

Mateo started shrieking in the other room, startled awake. Jane jumped up to grab him, smoothing her hair and skirt as she went.

Xo looked amused, like she was holding back a chuckle. "Go easy on him, okay? Jane's a big girl."

"No, Xiomara, I will not go easy on this scoundrel who puts his hands on my daughter! Our daughter." He corrected, seeing her eyes narrow. She shook her head and went to follow Jane.

"You! Cad! What do you have to say for yourself. Explain your actions!" He demanded, crossing his arms. It had been years since I'd been yelled at by a girl's angry father. I buttoned my shirt up as quickly as I could, wracking my brain for the right thing to say. At the worst possible time, I came up blank. "Well?" Rogelio demanded. "Speak!"

I looked towards Jane's room. The door appeared to be closed. I waved Rogelio near. "We need to speak privately." I murmured. "I don't want Jane finding out about my plan before it's ready."

Rogelio looked pensive, yet suspicious. "Explain further and I may be inclined to accommodate you."

I ran a hand through my hair. "I didn't plan on having this conversation under these circumstances, but I would like to ask you for permission to marry Jane."

Rogelio's eyes widened, then darted towards the door. "You're right. This isn't the time or place. Come to my house next week. We can talk then." He said quietly, putting a hand on my shoulder. "Now, I must yell at you. I don't want them getting suspicious." He gave me a small smile. "How dare you debauch my daughter like that! I ought to challenge you!"

"Challenge him to what?" Xo asked, coming out of the bedroom with Jane.

"Seriously, Dad? We've talked about this. You can't keep yelling at Rafael." Jane sighed with a little smile for him. She looked at me. Her cheeks flushed slightly. Rogelio cleared his throat.

"So, I should go." I said, kissing Jane on her forehead. "I'll text you tonight." I turned my attention to Mateo. "Goodbye, Handsome. Daddy loves you, I'll see you tomorrow." And the next day, and every day. I won't ever leave you. I promise.

"Rafael, wait." Jane stopped me. "Are you busy tonight? Doing anything?"

I shook my head. "No, why?"

She bit her lip. "I feel bad you only got to see Mateo for a few minutes. Can we come spend the night with you?"

I couldn't help the smile that broke across my face. I expected Rogelio to vehemently object, but he was surprisingly quiet. "Yeah, I would love that."

"Great! I'll go get some things." She said, before scurrying off with a little extra spring in her step.

Xo raised an eyebrow at me. "How's it going with the house?"

I grinned. "I should be closing next month, then we get to renovate. We're right on schedule."

"Good." Xiomara nodded. "If that display earlier was any indicator, you better move fast on that, or someone won't be wearing white to her potential wedding."

"You know I wouldn't do that." I softly replied. "It's important to Jane, so it's important to me."

She gave me a little smile as Jane and Mateo returned from their room. Apparently that was the right answer.

"Okay, we're good to go!" Jane said brightly, heading towards the door. "I'll see you tomorrow after class, Ma."

Xiomara just waved and smiled. She could be very hard to read. We got Mateo in the car, plus the diaper and overnight bags.

"Do you want dinner before we head over?" I asked.

"We're nearing the witching hour." Jane replied. "Whatever we get, it has to be fast!"

"Done." I said, thinking of a great Italian take out place. I took us slightly out of the way so that we could drive by the house. Jane laughed when she realized where we were.

"You really love that new house of yours, don't you?"

I smiled, then evaded the question. "I love the potential. I think it's going to be a great home."

We drove in comfortable silence for a short while. I picked up the food, then drove us back to the hotel. As we were getting on the elevator, it hit me.

"Did I tell you I switched rooms? The penthouse is being rented, and I'm in another suite until the house is done."

"Oh?" Jane asked. "What's this one like?"

"Smaller." I laughed. "Two bedrooms and a living room. You should see Mateo's room. It's packed!" The bell on the elevator dinged as we hit the top floor. I opened my new apartment door to reveal an efficient fourteen hundred square feet.

"Wow! I'm impressed. Look at you, living in a reasonable amount of space." Jane teased, wandering into Mateo's room to find an activity mat. She came back out with a confused look. "Where's all the nursery furniture?"

I pretended to be consumed with plating our take out. "Mateo didn't sleep in there anyway, so I donated it. I figured we can decorate his new nursery together after I close on the house."

Jane lifted an eyebrow. "Why am I helping to renovate your house, again?"

I smiled a self deprecating grin. "I'm actually hopeless at decorating. I usually just hire someone. And like I said, I'm bringing your mom and grandma, too."

Jane laughed, then looked thoughtful. "Why didn't Mateo ever sleep in the nursery?"

"I didn't really like the reminder." I said quietly.

"Is that why you're moving? And why you changed apartments?" My beautiful, perceptive Jane.

"It's definitely related. But no, not entirely. I'm ready to start a new chapter, with a family. Not literally living at work." Jane nodded, then picked up her plate. We sat down at the coffee table, feeding Mateo tiny bites of our food. "He's really calm tonight." I mentioned.

"He always seems calmer when Daddy's around, right Mateo?" My soon jammed another fist full of pasta into his mouth.

"I guess we'll have to do this more often, then. I'm in a better mood with my family around, too." I looked over at Jane. She smiled a little, then slowly pressed her lips to mine.

"I'd like that." She said. Mateo starting whining just as I got a work call. "Go, take care of it. I'm just going to give him his bottle and change him for bed."

"Thank you." I said sincerely, before taking the call in my room. Ten minutes later I was done, and joined Jane in reading some books to Mateo before bed. We sang the Itsy Bitsy Spider and the Alphabet, watched his eyes droop during Old MacDonald. Then we kissed him and put him in the pack and play.

We snuck out of the room, and I pulled the last box out of the to go bag. "Chocolate baklava." I said, holding it up. "It will change your life."

"I hope not too much." Jane laughed. "I love my life. My family, Mateo, you." My heart stopped. "I know I froze when you mentioned it earlier. I don't even know if you meant it or if I'd was a heat of the moment thing. But I do. I love you."

I joined her on the couch, cupping her lovely face in my hands, melting her mouth to mine. "Of course I meant it. Of course I love you. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. I've loved you for more than a year now. Even when I wanted to stop I couldn't."

Jane looked almost sad. "I just don't understand how you've forgiven me. I strung you along and then picked someone else."

"You always forgive family, right? Besides, I'm not blameless. I broke up with you first. But I did something else, and I need to confess."

Her face clouded. "What?"

"Please listen to the whole thing. I know what I did was so wrong and so illegal. And it meant I had to lie to you, and I have to come clean. I heard Michael confess to letting Nadine go on the monitor. I paid one of her friends to go to the police with the information."

Jane looked shocked, then furious. She stood up. "So you lied. You got Michael fired for no reason and you lied about it."

"I lied to you, and I regret it. But it wasn't for no reason and I don't regret turning him in. Jane, Nadine had information that could have led to Rose's arrest. She killed my father. She got me to institutionalize my own sister. Her crime ring sent my hotel into free fall so badly that I lost you trying to save it."

Jane turned away. "How can I forgive you? I have to go. I'll get Mateo."

"Jane, wait. If we want this to work, we need to work on our communication. You're upset, so tell me. Tell me that I hurt you, and your trust. Tell me how to fix it. Don't run, let's fight through this. Life is hard, marriage is hard. We have to work through things." I pleaded.

"Fine. I'm furious. I'm furious you lied when I asked you if you'd reported him. I'm furious you threw money at a problem instead of manning up and doing the right thing. I'm mad at you for getting Michael fired. But I'm also mad at myself. For not thinking about how that information would affect you."

"You're completely right." I agreed. "Though Michael was apparently just suspended, not fired. He was working today. I should have gone to the police myself. I definitely shouldn't have paid that guy off. It was wrong. I don't want you to be mad at yourself, though." I said, gently taking her hand in mine. "We can't change what's done. We can only learn from it and move on. And I love you way too much to want to see you hurting."

Jane was quiet a long while. "I love you, too. But it's going to take me some time to adjust. I have a thing about lying."

I nodded. "I know."

Shortly after we said our good nights. I laid in my bed staring at the wall, imagining Jane just twenty feet away. My family was with me, but a hundred miles away and inaccessible.

My arms longed to hold her. I imagined her knocking on my door and coming to sleep with me. But when the sunlight spilled into the room the next morning, I was still alone.

A/n: Finally some action! Good lord. Next chapter Christmas. I felt like he had to address his part in the unfortunate Michael scenario. How do you guys feel about the Rogelio dialogue? He's hard to write. As always, your criticisms are always welcome! -K

PS-Mercedes88, I love you forever! Thank you for all your reviews. They really make my day!


	5. Chapter 5

I was very fortunate Jane could only hold one grudge at a time. I was less fortunate in that the friend who betrayed her did it by writing a tell all article about my family. Sources included the mother of my child and my sister.  
It had been about a week since our fight, and I was getting nervous. She declined to go to counseling with me, citing a busy schedule, but our linked calendars suggested that wasn't the whole truth. Our dates dwindled into custodial hand offs. I wondered if telling her was the right thing to, done in the name of full disclosure and openness, or if I had really done it to assuage my own guilty conscience. Then the phone call came.  
"Rafael? Rafael, I'm so sorry. I didn't know. I had no idea!" It was Jane, and she was upset.  
"I'm sure it's okay." I reassured her.  
"No. No, it's not. Wesley wrote an article about your family. A bad one. A really bad one, Rafael. I'm so sorry. I didn't know."  
"Hey, it's okay." I said again. "Can you send it to me? I'll forward it to my lawyers if it's as bad as you think."  
"Okay." Jane agreed quietly. "I really had no idea. Text me later, if you have time?"  
"Of course. I'll always have time for you. Text you when it's settled. I love you."  
Jane ended the call. A moment later I heard a quiet ping as the article hit my inbox. I started reading it. It was absolutely as bad as Jane thought, especially the things Luisa said. I ran my hands through my hair. The two women I loved most on this earth, both so smart, both so cripplingly naive. Someone was also alleging some gross financial misconduct on my part, money that seemed to disappear. At least no one could track it to the shelter. I called my lawyers, sent them the article. They swore they could shut it down before the paper copy came out, and get it off the site within a few hours. I let out a deep breath, then texted Jane.  
It's been taken care of. Don't worry.  
I'm so sorry, Rafael. I didn't mean to.  
I rubbed my eyes. It was like she didn't trust anything I said. We needed to talk.  
Can I come over? I think we should talk.  
There was a long pause while I waited for her reply text.  
Let me come over there. Be there in fifteen.  
I let out a deep breath. Finally we were going to talk. I checked my work email while I waited for her, made a quick call, little things to waste the minutes. That's what my life had become-Wasted minutes between seeing Jane or Mateo. A soft knock came from the door. I wondered if it was Jane, but she had her own key. I wandered over to the door and opened it, before raising an eyebrow.  
"You have a key."  
She blushed. "I know. It's just your text seemed serious, and I wasn't sure if you wanted me just wandering in, or..." She trailed off.  
"Hey," I said softly, "Come in. Sit." She shuffled in, and I closed the door behind her. "You know I love you, right? There's nothing you would do that I couldn't forgive."  
She sat down on the couch and sighed. "But the article. It was bad."  
I sat down next to her, our thighs touching. She scooted an inch over so we were no longer in contact. "It was bad." I acknowledged. "But I fixed it. It happens. It's not your fault, you trusted him. You didn't know."  
She buried her face in her hands. "How do you do that? How do you forgive so easily?"  
I pried her hands away from her face and took them in mine. Our eyes met, she looked nervous. "Why do you look nervous?" I asked quietly. "I love you. I'm not upset with you. You and Mateo are everything to me. I would never do anything to hurt you, I would do anything not to lose you again. So forgiveness is easy. The alternative is just not something I'm willing to accept." Jane bit her bottom lip. "Hey." I prompted. "What are you thinking?"  
She was quiet for a minute. She looked at our entwined hands, at my face, in my eyes. "It's just." She paused. "Your feelings are overwhelming. And sometimes they overwhelm me. And sometimes I worry."  
"Worry?"  
Her head fell forward, resting on our hands. "Sometimes I worry if I let my guard down and let myself really fall for you, that things will get too intense, and that I'll forget who I am."  
"And who are you?" I asked.  
"Jane the Virgin." She muttered. My face split into a huge grin. "Stop smiling. I can feel it."  
"So you're afraid to get too close because you're worried we'll have sex? Just clarifying." I tried to stop smiling. I couldn't.  
"Rafael! It's not funny! My identity took a serious hit when I got pregnant then became a Mom, being a virgin feels like all that's left of my old life sometimes. Be serious."  
"Okay." I said softly. "Here's what I was afraid your reasons would be. One, I was just a fantasy for you and the reality just doesn't live up. Two, you only wanted to be together for Mateo and you've discovered that's not enough. Scenario three, you spent our entire relationship still in love with Michael, and even though you've accepted you can't be together, he's still the one you really want. Or option four, part of you has never forgiven me for not calling six years ago, and I've been confirming that grudge every time I make even a little mistake, let alone my bigger, stupider failings. That one's the worst. Then it's completely my fault."  
Jane look horrified. "I don't understand. Why didn't you tell me? That must have been awful!"  
I shrugged, smiled. "Like I said, losing you is worse than any other option. You are everything to me. I can't help that's how I feel. And I don't want to feel any other way. So yes, finding out the reason you can't seem to commit emotionally is because you're so tempted to tear off my clothes and have your way with me is some of the best news I've ever gotten."  
"Let's not paraphrase quite that much." Jane replied, deadpan.  
"But that is what's holding you back." My grin was going to crack my face.  
"Yes." She replied, darkly.  
"So let's fix it." I said hopefully. "Let's set some rules, put up some boundary lines. I'll start. I promise not to penetrate any part of you with any part of me unless we get married."  
Jane looked doubtful. "I'm not saying I don't want to, trust me, I do, but I'm saying I love you more than I want to have my way with you."  
Finally she relaxed a little and started to laugh. "Have your way with me?"  
I shrugged. "You're a romance novel writer. I figured you'd appreciate it."  
"I do." She nodded. "Okay, so no one will be penetrating anyone. No getting carried away in the heart of the moment, like last time."  
"Agreed." I said in a surprisingly neutral tone, considering I was enjoying the memory of her naked, wrapped around me, and begging for me to make love to her. "So I think you should take the lead. Before we fool around, I think you should set parameters, and I promise to respect them."  
"So, how do I set them? Just say 'I'm up for upper body only?' Or more specific?"  
I put my hands on her waist. "More specific. Over or under your clothes? Does that include under wear?"  
She inhaled deeply. "Over clothes."  
"Okay." I said, before slowly kissing her neck. "You trust me, right?"  
"Yes, of course." Jane replied, almost a whisper.  
I kept kissing up her neck, watching her eyes drift closed. I let my hands slowly caress her sides as they trailed up her body to her face. Then I smiled before kissing her again, deeply. As I pulled away she moaned a little in protest.  
"Before I get distracted, while I have you talking, what's your timeline?"  
"What?" Jane exclaimed. "What timeline?"  
"Marriage. Maybe more children?" I replied, wrapping my arms around her and pulling her closer.  
Jane blushed. "Is marriage something you're thinking about?" She asked.  
"It is. But the question is, where is marriage on your timeline?"  
Jane leaned back into my arms and looked at the ceiling for a moment. " I always said I wanted to be done college before getting engaged. But I have graduated, and grad school could be years. I wanted to be debt free, but as a writer, who knows how long that could be. I love you, I just don't want anything to be rushed. I want us to enjoy this, to enjoy every stage of our relationship. So I don't want to skip through dating, you know?"  
"Yeah." I said softly. "It's not something I can put in my calendar, but I hear you." I kissed her again, savoring the feel of her lips on mine.  
"You shouldn't put it in your calendar." Jane murmured against my mouth. "Or it won't be a surprise."  
"Can you stay? I asked between kisses, enjoying holding her. She shook her head.  
"No, Ma's working an early shift. But soon?" She started to get up.  
"Of course." I murmured against her hair.  
We left my suite, and I walked her to the front door of the hotel. I cupped her face in my hand.  
"Rafael, I just-" She looked troubled. I pointed above us.  
"Mistletoe." I interrupted. "I love you. Now stop worrying and kiss me."  
First she smiled. Then she did. It was lingering and passionate, certainly different from the kisses I'd been getting. She trusted me. She believed in us.  
"I should go." She said shyly. "Before you drag me back upstairs."  
"Oh?" I asked her with a smirk. "Are you sure it's not the other way around?"  
"Shut up." She said laughing. "I love you. Thank you."  
"The pleasure is all mine." I said, winking. "Or at least, it will be."  
Jane came closer, pulling me down by my shirt so she could whisper in my ear. "Well I hope you can share. I want some, too."  
My mouth went dry, my heart stopped, the blood rushed away from my head. I gaped at her while she laughed. Then I watched her walk out the door to her car.  
"Stop staring at my daughter like that." Came a stern voice from behind me.  
"Rogelio! Sir." I floundered. "I didn't see you."  
"Obviously not, or you wouldn't have manhandled my daughter like that! I don't even want to know the filth you were telling her."  
If he only knew.  
Rogelio continued. "You have not texted me, you have not visited. You upset her, then you bring her to your hotel! My daughter is not a booty call!"  
I cringed. "Let's take this upstairs so we can talk. In private."  
He frowned. "I'll bet that's just what you said to Jane."  
Well I don't want to have my way with you, I said in my head. We awkwardly made our way back to my suite. I closed the door, fighting a bizarre feeling of déjà vu.  
"Did Jane say anything about our fight last week?"  
"Everyone heard about it." Rogelio responded. "Xiomara said she hadn't seen Jane that mad in years!"  
Great.  
"It was a bad fight. I wasn't sure she would forgive me. So asking you for your blessing seemed inappropriate, given the circumstances."  
Rogelio tapped a finger against his pursed lips. "And has that situation been resolved?"  
I nodded. "It seems to have been."  
He looked at me pointedly. "So let's have that talk."  
Nervousness was not something I was accustomed to feeling. I avoided things to circumvent failure, I would generally take the easy victory over the hard road with poor chance of success. Asking Jane to marry me the first time was so easy, because I had been convinced she'd say yes. Asking Rogelio for permission was nerve wracking. Him saying yes was a latent way of giving permission for me to have sex with his daughter. He was best friends with Michael. My odds were grim. But I had to try.  
"Yeah, okay. Let's sit." I gestured towards the couch.  
Rogelio raised an eyebrow. "Your casting couch won't work on me."  
'Grace in the face of adversity' I heard Jane whisper in my head. Maybe she had been praying? I couldn't remember.  
"I deserve that." I began. "I deserve a lot of things. Scorn, derision, mistrust. I made a lot of terrible mistakes when Jane and I dated. I certainly can't excuse that. She absolutely deserves better. She deserves the best, deserves everything I can give her. She's selfless, smart, beautiful, everything anyone could ever want in a partner. And she would be- My partner, that is, in everything. I love her, and I want to spend the rest of my life making her happy. With your blessing, may I marry your daughter?"  
Rogelio looked a little moist around the eyes, but I would never say it. "As you know, I never expected to have this moment. Now that it's here, it's actually quite hard for me." He paused for a second, gathering himself and putting his tough face back on. "Make it easier. Tell me how you will make her happy."  
I looked at him, surprised. "Xiomara didn't tell you? I bought the house for her. She's picking all the renovations. There's an in law suite for Alba to live in, and rooms for you and Xiomara to visit."  
I continued on, telling him about the surprise room for Jane, the one I was hiding from her. Then I told him about how I would propose, then when the wedding would be, if Jane agreed. I finally got a small smile out of him.  
"You've thought this out. I can appreciate that. Let's see the ring. And the papers. Only the best for Jane! I will make sure of that." I went over to my bedside drawer, and grabbed a small red box. Rogelio raised an eyebrow. "Cartier? Hmm. I would have taken you to be a Winston man."  
"Petra's engagement ring was Winston. I'm smarter now. Winston is the King of Diamonds, but Cartier is the Royal Jeweler; an artist like Jane. We both want the best for her."  
Rogelio cracked the box and took a quick breath in. "It's perfect." He handed it back. "You seem serious. I hope you don't mess up again. I don't know you very well, but I can see you're a devoted father, and you will be a devoted husband to my daughter." Tentatively he put his hand on my shoulder. "Last year I gained a daughter, and this year I gain a son."  
"Does that mean?"  
"Yes, Rafael. You have my permission and blessing to marry Jane."  
"Thank you." I replied, over the moon.  
One down, two to go.

A/n: Sorry if this seems rushed or stilted. And short. I'm on week 2 with fairly severe shingles and feel like garbage. Anyway, I hated how the writers skipped Christmas, so I planned it for this chapter! But after like three rewrites it was so boring! I nixed it. I really wanted Rogelio to give Raf a hard time, since this is the only time he'll get to fill the stereotypical "overprotective father" role in Jane's life.


	6. Chapter 6

The sex dreams were ruining my life. Every night was a never ending, pornographic picture show of Jane. Every sexual encounter I'd ever had was replayed with Jane in the lead. She was in lingerie, in bondage, in nothing but heels, in costumes, in mini skirts. We were in bed, on vacation, in public, in a car, in a plane. I took her in every imaginable position; laying, standing, sitting, kneeling, suspended from the ceiling.

It was horrible. I went to bed every night exhausted, and woke up even more so. I tried taking care of the situation myself, more time in the gym, more cold showers, falling asleep at my desk. Absolutely nothing helped. I found myself on edge for the smallest, most insignificant infraction, and distracted all the time. How was I supposed to pay attention at a board meeting when all I could think about was Jane spread eagle on the table?

And the guilt. I was ashamed of myself. Jane was an incredible person, the wonderful mother of my child. I should be able to abstain for her sake without reverting to my college age self, obsessed with trying to find a place to put it, if only in my wet dreams.

"Mr Solano. Mr Solano. Mr Solano?"

"Rafael!" Jane chastened me quietly. "Pay attention!"

"Yes, sorry." I responded. "What was that?"

"One last signature here, and here's your keys!" The realtor seemed very excited.

"Great. Thank you." I said, taking the proffered keys and shaking his hand. Jane and I walked outside. "Thank you for coming." I said to her sincerely. "I enjoyed having you there."

"I liked being there." She replied. "Are you worried about this afternoon?"

Petra's induction. I shook my head. "Less than I should be. I have no idea how I'm going to handle twins."

Jane planted a soft kiss on my cheek. "You're an amazing father. You'll figure it out."

"Yeah." I said. But it felt like a hallow promise. I gently kissed her goodbye and promised to text her Petra's progress.

On the way to the hospital I felt searing guilt. I'd been invested and excited about every moment of Mateo's life since his conception. I cried at ultrasounds, I fantasized about holding him. But I couldn't seem to get invested in Petra's pregnancy.

I was sure I'd love the babies once they were born, but it didn't make me feel any better about the present. I pulled up to the hospital and parked. My ex wife should have been waiting for me in the maternity wing, but she wasn't there.

A receptionist saw me standing there alone and waved me over. "Are you Mr Solano?" She asked in a chipper voice.

"I am." I replied.

"Mrs Solano is already in a room. She came in this morning with ruptured membranes."

"What?" I nearly yelled, incredulous. "Why didn't anyone call me?"

The receptionist smiled. "She said you were closing on a house and couldn't be disturbed. Tough lady, Mrs Solano. But you know that." I nodded, dazed. "She's in room 6, second on the left."

I thanked the woman, put on the identifying bracelet she gave me, and headed back. I walked into Petra's room and was surprised by its complete darkness.

On the bed was my ex wife, in a white hospital gown. She looked like a fallen angel, a pale, broken creature in a dark room. She may there, completely silent except her quiet breathing. The nurse came in behind me. "She's having a hard labor, but you couldn't tell looking at her, hmm? I bet the poor thing's had a lot of pain in her life." She make a tsk noise quietly. "You don't have to say, I can tell. Well, she's having back to back contractions, about ten minutes then a thirty second rest before the next ones."

"Hasn't she asked for an epidural?" I asked, confused.

"No, she keeps refusing them." The nurse muttered. "Well, I'll be back in fifteen minutes. Call if you need me sooner."

"Thank God she's gone." Petra muttered tightly from the bed. "She's all nonsense."

I wasn't sure she was. "Why haven't you gotten an epidural?" I asked her, but she was already being gripped by another contraction. She lay there, perfectly motionless and silent.

The minutes passed, I watched the fetal monitors. The babies didn't seem to mind the squeezing. Finally it ended.

"I can't stop thinking about the one we lost." She said quietly. "I had an epidural for his delivery. I want to-Have to experience this."

And she was gone again, lost to another contraction. As time passed she stopped talking between contractions, taking the break to breathe and prepare for the next set. Her strings of contractions got longer, going from ten minutes to twenty within a couple of hours.

By early evening, she was ready to push. I held a leg, told her she was doing great. She was so close to holding her babies, that she could do it. Petra was focused at the task at hand, pushing like she'd been waiting for this her entire life.

The first baby emerged with a vengeful shriek. They quickly swaddled her and handed her to me. "Look at this beautiful girl, Petra." I said, showing the baby to her. Her eyes widened. Her face became ashen. I wanted to ask if she was okay, but she was overtaken by another contraction and began pushing the second child out.

The second child came into the world quietly, with a few small mewling noises. She was swaddled and given to an exhausted looking Petra, who looked at her like she'd never seen a baby before. Her face softened. She was fond of the babies while she was pregnant, but in that moment I watched Petra become a mother in spirit and soul. She started speaking quickly to her in Czech. It sounded reassuring.

Finally she looked at me, her face full of resolve. "Rafael, you need to know something." Her voice was flat. "When Roman kidnapped me, I managed to get my cell phone back to call the police by having sex with him."

I looked down at the small child in my arms. The small, dark twin in my arms. It came to me in perfect clarity. I didn't feel like a father, because I wasn't. Not to these children. These children suddenly reminded me of Petra's sins as my wife. Their father was the friend who betrayed me and helped to run a crime syndicate out of my hotel. Their father was Roman Zazo.

Could I love these children? I looked back at Petra. She wasted my last sample. I could not forgive her. Could I? It was too much. I handed her the child I was holding and left the room.

"It's okay." I heard Petra coo to the babies as I walked away. She sounded strong, determined. "I love you. The three of us? We have each other."

I walked as fast as I could put of the hotel, to my car, back to the hotel. I looked at my clock as I entered the apartment, just before eight at night.

Can you come over? I texted Jane. The babies aren't mine.

A moment later her reply arrived.

Be there in ten.

I wished my room still had a bar. If I wanted a stiff drink, and I very much did, I would have to go down to the bar and deal with everyone's congratulations. I couldn't explain the paternity issue right now. I would just wait for Jane.

The minutes crawled by as I agonized about Petra and the babies' roles in my life. It felt strangely wrong to completely cut them out. Zaz had been my best friend, for all his short comings. Petra was my wife once, despite her short comings. Despite that they'd been sleeping together. But I had told Roman our marriage was over. Petra wasted my last sample, but I had misled her to believe I still loved her. I hadn't caused this situation, but I was certainly culpable in contributing to it.

Without me, the only person in Petra's life was Milos, and he was still in jail.

The lock clicked softly as Jane let herself in. "Rafael, are you okay? What happened? How do you know they're not yours? Did Petra say something?" She joined me in the couch, wrapping her arms around me.

I rubbed my palms against my eyes. "They were very dark. I didn't even notice, but Petra started to panic. After they were born, Petra told me that when Zaz had kidnapped her, she slept with him to get her phone back so she could call for help. She had no idea she was already pregnant when she used my sample."

"Oh, Rafael."

"Yeah. Now I have to figure out if I want to be involved in their lives. And if I do, how much."

"Wow. That's a big decision." Jane said evenly.

"Any input?" I asked with a twisted smirk. "Because I have no idea where to start."

Jane frowned. "My opinion? Don't think about it tonight. Just take it all in, feel all the hurt and disappointment and anger. Then tomorrow you can let it out, go see Petra, and talk it out with her."

I let out a long sigh. "You're right." I said, shaking my head. "You're pretty smart." A ghost of a smile crossed my face, and it brought a smile to hers. "Come to bed with me? Is that okay with your family?"

Jane nodded. "Mateo's already in bed for the night. Ma has him. I just have to be home by eight tomorrow morning."

"Good." I said, pulling her into my arms and easily standing up. "I need you with me. Did you bring pajamas?"

Jane blushed. "I'm wearing them. I left the house without changing."

For the first time since she arrived I really looked at her. She was wearing a white tank top with thin straps and tiny green cotton shorts. Really tiny.

"They're my mom's." Jane said, catching my roaming eyes. "Tomorrow is laundry day."

I laughed, walking us to my bed. "Laundry day? I completely forgot about that. I guess I'll have to get used to it again."

"You poor thing. How ever will you survive?" Jane said flatly, a twinkle in her eye. I dropped her on the bed, then started to tickle her. "Ah! Stop! Uncle! Uncle!"

"You poor thing, how will you ever survive?" I parroted back with a grin.

In the midst of her laughter, Jane launched herself at me, grabbing me by the neck and pulling me down on top of her. I put my hands above our heads to stop me from falling on her. My face was an inch from hers, we were both breathing heavy with exertion. I leaned my head down and lightly laid my lips against hers.

Sparks flew between us. We were both hungry for more. I took one hand and slowly traced it from her hip, over her breast, up her neck, to her chin. I lifted her chin slightly.

"I love you." I murmured, before lightly brushing my lips against hers. "So much. I love you."

I trailed the hand on her chin up her cheek, through her hair. My mouth gently descended to hers again. Jane moaned softly into my mouth, her arms wrapping around me, clutching my shirt. She was pliant and willing beneath me, her chest heaving, her nipples erect and completely visible through her thin tank top as they rubbed against my chest.

"Oh, Rafael." She whispered as I nuzzled her soft, warm neck. Her scent was driving me crazy. "I love you, too. Oh! Yes."

I put my hand on her knee, slowly sliding it up to the edge of her shorts. She made a small gasping noise as my fingers brushed against the bottom of her ass. "What are the limits here?" I asked, aware of the potential of getting carried away.

"Second base." Jane replied quickly, pulling my shirt over my head. I laughed softly, and raised an eyebrow.

"What base would that be, again?"

Jane blushed. "Under the clothes, over the underwear."

I pulled off my shirt, then teasingly hooked my fingers into her miniscule shorts. To my surprise, she lifted her hips and slid them off, revealing her pastel lace panties. I drew a sharp breath.

"Don't look too much into this. It's weird fooling around in my mom's shorts." She grinned, sitting up and gently touching my shoulder and arm with her hand.

"You're not wearing a bra, but you gave me permission to go under your clothes. Can I look into that as a sign of your interest?" I asked, returning my mouth to her neck.

"Maybe." She teased. "Maybe I like you a little."

I nipped her neck. "Well I like you a lot." I whispered in her ear, before grabbing the bottom of her shirt and pulling it over her head. Jane playfully shrieked as she was exposed, covering her breasts with her hands. I cupped her face in my hands. "You are so beautiful. Really." I murmured, before gently kissing her again.

Her hands left her breasts, and planted themselves on my shoulders, intermittently running through my hair. I let my hands slowly drift down her face, to her neck, down her back. Jane arched her back, coming closer to my body. Slowly I leaned her back down on the bed, reclaiming my position on top of her.

My mouth left hers, kissing and lightly sucking on her neck, her collarbones. One arm supported my weight, the other gently caressed her breast. She gasped, her hands clutched at my hair.

"Keep going?" I asked, making eye contact.

"Yes. Oh, yes!" Jane said loudly. My ego swelled. I let my head move lower, showered her bosom with kisses. I inhaled her scent, before finally letting one of my hands move to her nipple. I gently rolled it between my fingers, and Jane ran her finger nails across my back, shouting my name.

My mouth found the other nipple, and I circled it with my tongue. I teased her with a few languid licks, before gently raking my teeth against it and suckling. Jane wrapped her legs around me, grinding her pelvis against me.

"Too much?" I asked.

"Don't stop! Don't you dare stop!" She gasped, pulling my mouth back to hers. She continued to rock her hips against my erection. My hand finally abandoned her nipple as it buried itself in her hair and I gave into the delicious torture that was meeting Jane's thrusts with my own.

"You are so perfect." I ground out, adjusting my thrust so the most pressure would be near her clitoris.

"Yes!" Jane called out. "There! Right there!" She was panting, her body increasingly rigid.

"Jane, oh Jane." My teeth were gritted, my blood was pulsing, my body was tight. Pressure was building inside me. I was close, so close, inexplicably so. Beneath me Jane's head was thrown back in ecstasy as she called my name over and over.

"Oh, Rafael. I'm-Oh!" She rasped. "Oh Rafael. I need you. Oh Rafael. Rafael!"

Suddenly her hands left my hair and her arms wrapped around me. She screamed as her orgasm ripped through her and her nails dug into my back. Her eyes were open, looking straight into mine.

I continued to grind my hips against hers, watching her nearly convulse with the force of her climax. Suddenly I was overwhelmed by the pressure in me exploding into an indescribable wave of pleasure. I came hard and fast, coming until there was nothing left and I was totally spent.

"Did that really just happen?" Jane whispered, covering her smile and blush with her hands.

"Yes." I replied solemnly. "I'm apparently fifteen again. The things you do to me." I buried my nose in her hair, breathing deeply.

Jane grinned. "Actually, Mr Solano, I'm pretty sure it's the things you to to me."

I kissed her again, deeply. "I love you." I breathed. And that night, against all odds, for the first time in months, I slept soundly.

A/n: Obviously he slept soundly after cleaning himself up! I'm convinced Petra's kids aren't Raf's. Hopefully I'm not the only one! Next chapter should be fun and fluffy.


	7. Chapter 7

For whatever reason, I had a hard time imagining Petra being maternal. Even though I watched her become a mother, I was still completely surprised when I entered her hospital room the next morning to find her tandem nursing.

There were huge dark circles under her eyes, and her hair was a disaster. I'd never seen her so unkempt. Guilt gripped me. Well of course she looked rough, I left her totally alone in the world with two newborns. She looked over, noticed me standing by the door.

"What do you want." She asked, tersely.

"To apologize." I replied. She looked over, her big blue eyes giving away her hurt.

"You have nothing to apologize for. I don't know why it never occurred to me, why I didn't consider the possibility."

"I'm sure, considering everything you went through, that you blocked it out to protect yourself. I'm not excusing using my sample, but I get it."

Petra continued to look down at the babies. "Rafael." She said softly. "Why are you here?"

I walked father into the room. "I want to be in these babies' lives." I replied. She looked at me, shocked.

"You didn't seem to want that yesterday. We won't accept your pity."

"No," I replied. "It's not like that. You're my ex wife. We really loved each other once. Zaz was my best friend. As horrible as your affair was, these babies mean something to me."

She looked down, contemplative. "They are pretty great." She smiled that little smile of hers.

"They are." I smiled back. "So here's my proposal. I want to be in their lives. If you're ever overwhelmed or exhausted, I want you to call me. I'd also like to volunteer my fun uncle services for one weekend every month. I'll have a room at the house renovated for them."

Petra slowly nodded. "I'll take you up on the emergency help, we'll see about the sleep overs. Raf, it's incredible. I can't imagine being apart from them. I-I've never felt anything like this, to be totally honest. All the losses, I thought I could never love a child more than the ones we lost. Not that I didn't love them. It's difficult to explain."

I put my hand on her shoulder, reassuringly. "I know exactly how you feel. I felt the same way when Mateo was born."

For the countless horrible things she'd done, I could never truly forgive her. But I could move forward. I left the hospital a few hours later, and noticed a missed text from Jane.

Hey, you! How are things going with Petra and the girls? Still shopping today?

I texted back.

Of course. I'm heading over now.

It was finally the day we were meeting with the contractor to choose our renovation materials. I had six weeks until the proposal, just enough time for the renovation to be finished.

I picked up Jane, Xiomara, Alba, and Mateo brought them to the store. The contractor was there waiting for us.

"Good to see you! Let's see, you're picking hardwood for downstairs, fixtures for the kitchen and bathroom, new light fixtures throughout, and a new kitchen. We can talk paint in a couple of weeks."

Jane looked positively giddy. I smiled at her, then grabbed her hand with mine. "Where do we start?"

"Hardwoods. Unless you'd prefer laminate?"

"No." I replied. "Hardwoods."

We spent the next ten minutes looking through wood samples. "Rafael! Look at this one!" Jane exclaimed, pointing out an almost white bamboo floor. The contractor nodded.

"She's got great taste. That's long lasting and ecologically sustainable."

I rubbed her lower back. "It is perfect. We'll take it."

The contractor made a note on his clipboard, then brought us to the kitchen section, where we were greeted by a designer. I came up behind Jane, holding her waist and kissing her on the cheek. "Show me what you like."

Jane picked up a dark cabinet sample and a cream tinted, off white quartz counter piece. "Since the rest of the house is so traditional, maybe something more modern?"

I nodded. "Would you want to carry that color scheme throughout the bathrooms, too?"

Xiomara, overhearing the conversation, came over. "It's supposed to be what you want, isn't it Rafael?"

What? Why would she say that, she knew I bought the house for Jane. I plastered a magnanimous smile on my face. "Of course, Jane is just great with color schemes and I figured she'll be visiting, like she visits the hotel."

Jane shot her mother a warning look. "What's Abuela looking at?"

"Something about having cherry cabinets back in Venezuela or something. Mostly playing with Mateo."

As they talked about whether or not Mateo would be happier in or out of his stroller, I snuck over to the contractor and added a cherry kitchenette to Alba's in law suite.

Eventually we settled on all of the counters and cabinets and bathroom vanities coordinating. We picked fixture after fixture, lighting and bath, doorknobs and drawer pulls and towel bars. Before we knew it over an hour had passed.

"I need to give Mateo a bottle." Jane said, distracted.

"Of course." I replied, rubbing her back and kissing her cheek. "We'll finalize the paperwork while you feed him."

Alba looked from Jane to me. "Iré con Jane y Mateo." I'll go with Jane and Mateo.

They headed outside, I assumed to sit on the shaded benches out front. I turned to our contractor. He flipped through some pages on his clipboard. "I'm going to need you to sign here and here, and then you're free to go! You can come pick out the shower, tub, and closet designs any time in the next week."

"Great. Thank you." I said distractedly. As he walked away, I turned to Xiomara. "Can we talk sometime?"

She froze. "About what?" Her hands was clenched tightly around her purse strap. She bit her lip.

"Jane." I said. "I want to ask her to marry me."

"Already?" She asked incredulously. "It's been so little time. Isn't this too fast?"

"We were together for eight months before, and we've been together for three months now, four by the time I propose. That's a year. And we've been in each other's lives for another six months. It's not long, I agree. But I don't want to wait another year a year to be a family."

"So this is really about Mateo." She said, crossing her arms and raising an eyebrow.

"No! No. I love Jane. She's incredible. I can't imagine life without her. Even if she hadn't gotten pregnant with Mateo, I'm sure I would have still fallen for her."

"While you were married to someone else." Xiomara said, disapprovingly. Finally, the light dawned.

"Are you afraid I'll cheat on Jane?" She was quiet. "Xiomara, I would never cheat on anyone, let alone Jane. I've never cheated on anyone, ever. My mother cheated on my father, and my father cheated on every wife after her. Infidelity is why I grew up without a family."

"Still, even if it isn't that, what if you get bored? What if it's a million other things? What if you get divorced, and Jane waited for marriage for nothing?"

"First off, I could never get bored of Jane. Ever. She's the most fun, adorable, fascinating person I've ever met. Second, we've been through a lot in the last two years. The loss of my father, the amniocentesis, co parenting Mateo." I paused. "My horrible mistake, asking for a break. We've gone through counseling twice, and we'll do it again if we need it again."

Xiomara looked torn. "I'll think about it. I promised to keep an open mind, and I will. But I have to think about it first."

"Of course." I said softly, as we walked towards the exit. But I was nervous. She'd seemed okay with it a month ago, when she and Rogelio had walked in on us kissing. What had changed?

Two weeks later Jane and I were attending a charity ball together. Mateo was with Abuela for the night, and I was looking forward to living out the Jane fantasy that started me down this path.

"Do you want me to grab your cuff links?" Jane called from my bedroom, where she was changing.

"Please!" I called back. "They're in the second drawer down in the nightstand." A few minutes passed while I tied my bowtie and laced up my shoes. At one point I heard a squeak coming from the bedroom, then what sounded like jumping up and down. "Are you okay in there?"

Jane peeked her head around the doorway, flushed. "Yep!"

I crossed the room, then kissed her on top of her head. "I don't want to smudge your make up. Let's see that dress."

Jane smiled and stepped out from behind the door. She took my breath away. Her dress was form fitting, hugging her curves perfectly. There were four straps, two over her shoulders and two draped over her arms, that met at a neckline that hinted at cleavage, but wasn't too low. It fanned out below her knees. And it was fire engine red. I wanted her. My reaction was visceral; I wanted to peel it off of her and spend all night making love to her.

"Can you button the straps in the back? They meet behind my shoulders." Jane asked.

"Of course." I replied. The back was low. I did the buttons where the straps met, then ran my hand down her back, over her bottom. "I want to kiss you." I murmured near her ear.

"Is that all?" She asked, wrapping her arms around my neck. Her body pressed against mine.

"No." I breathed, before dropping my mouth to hers. I pulled her tighter against me, enjoying the feeling of her bottom in my hands. Our kiss was deep, finally broken when I came up for air. "I want you. All of you. Badly."

My voice was hoarse with need. Jane shivered in my arms. I took a small step back, reluctantly letting go.

"Sorry." I said, clearing my throat. "Way too much." I smiled at her.

Gently she reached out and stroked my cheek. "Hey. Don't do that. I love how passionate you are. Even if we're not in a place where we can explore it now, we will. We'll get there. I want to. A lot." She paused briefly. "Too much."

I kissed her cheek. "You look beautiful. We should go."

Bringing Jane was even better than my fantasy, I reflected happily. Over the last hour since our arrival she had been charming and fun, kept up with everyone and their interests, and still remained grounded.

"Rafael, you're never going to believe this." She whispered conspiratorially. "I went to grab you a shrimp cocktail, but they're all garnished with caviar!"

I sighed dramatically. "Not again."

She narrowed her eyes. "You're not serious."

"No." I agreed, and both of us started to laugh. We stood quietly through the opening address and toast. The dance floor was opened.

One by one couples filled the floor, swirling in their gowns and tuxes. "People still waltz?" Her tone was light, but I could see her jealousy. Jane did love to dance.

"Can you count to three?" I asked, taking our drinks and putting them on a nearby table.

"Sure." Jane replied, confused.

"Then let's go." I said, grabbing her hand and pulling her with me. Once we were on the fringe of the dancers, I put one hand on her waist, her hand on my shoulder and her other hand in mine. "It's easy. One big slow step, then two smaller, faster ones. One, two, three."

Jane didn't look convinced. "What else?"

"That's it. Everything else is my job. You just follow my lead."

"Okay." She muttered. She looked excited.

Slowly we started to move. I quietly counted for her, one-two-three, one-two-three. She picked it up as quickly as I knew she would, and soon we were sweeping across the ballroom with all the other dancers. As the song ended, a man dropped to his knee, ring in hand.

"That's tacky." I whispered to Jane.

"What, proposing in public?" She looked confused.

I cocked an eyebrow. "No, proposing at someone else's event."

She had the good manners to look chagrined. As we clapped politely for the happy couple. "Right. Sorry."

I kissed the on top of her head again. "Don't worry about it. Do you want to go for a walk around the grounds?"

"So, has the upper crust changed at all since 1850?"

I shrugged, then offered her my arm. "Fewer duels?"

She laughed, and the tension was gone. We emerged into the warm air of the lawn, heading towards the topiary maze near the docks.

Jane laughed. "So how many historic clichés does this manor have?"

"All of them so far," I replied. "I bet there's even some discretely placed benches in the maze."

"No!" She exclaimed excitedly. "Let's go. That's it, I'm setting my next book here."

She grabbed me by the hand and dragged me into the dimly lit labyrinth. It was much bigger than it looked from the outside.

"Left or right?" I asked her at the first turn.

"Left." She decided with a smirk. "Choosing right means no dark corners to hide in."

We walked deeper in, the light getting more scant as we progressed on. Finally it appeared in front of us, a large white marble bench deep set into the topiary walls of the maze.

"I think I'm obligated to kiss you." I said to her, wrapping her in my arms.

"I think so, too." She said playfully, smiling as she pressed her lips to mine. I ran my hands up and down her back. Her skin was warm, soft. She wrapped her arms around my neck, pressing her body to me.

I lifted her into my arms, muffling her gasp with my mouth. I walked us over to the bench and sat with Jane draped across my lap. I ran my hands over her lush curves, enjoying her quiet moans and mewling. Suddenly I felt one of her hands move from around my shoulders, trailing down my chest.

"I want to do a little research for my novel." Jane said huskily. "Ssh, be nice and quiet."

I was about to ask what she meant when I felt her hand grasping my erection through my pants. I tried to ask if she was sure, to say she didn't have to, but she just hushed me again. If she was anything, she was determined.

With a slow, steady hand she lowered my zipper. She was wholly focused on her task, biting her lip as she slipped her hand into my trousers and wrapped her hand around me.

I hadn't enjoyed a hand job since early high school, but I was finding this one eminently pleasurable. Her hand was alternating between too tight and too loose, going too slow then too fast, and I was still impossibly turned on.

Jane found her rhythm, and my arms tightened around her. I watched her beautiful face, her breasts slowly moving with her breathing, her hand moving up and down my shaft. I found myself getting closer, feeling that familiar tightening sensation.

"Oh, Jane." I moaned.

"Ssh." She reminded me. There was a glint in her eye. Then she leaned in and whispered in my ear. "I want you so badly. I can't wait to have you inside me."

That was all I needed. I came, hard and fast, spilling myself until there was nothing left. I kissed her deeply. "You're amazing." I whispered.

The stars twinkled above us, the air was warm and welcoming. And as I kissed Jane, I envisioned us spending the rest of our lives together.

A/n: Oh, man. I'm having a hard time sticking with this. Sorry if it seems all over the place or stilted. Four more chapters to go!

If you guys like pretty dresses as much as I do, Jane's dress was Narciso Rodriguez's Crimson Cutout Gown. It's on Rent the Runway, so I think it's something Jane might legitimately wear. You know, if she were branching out from her standard pastel full skirt natural waist thing. And also real. -K


	8. Chapter 8

I knocked on the Villenueva front door promptly at nine thirty in the morning. My suit was dark grey and crisp, I was freshly shaved, and Jane's ring was securely stashed in my pocket.

The front door swung open. "Rafael?" Jane asked, surprised. "I didn't know you were coming over."

I wrapped my arms around her waist, kissing her on the cheek. "That's because I'm not here for you." I teased.

Alba bustled towards the door. "Dejar un poco de espacio para que el espíritu santo." Leave some room for the Holy Spirit.

I released Jane. "Of course. Are you ready to go?"

Jane looked between us suspiciously. "What's going on here?"

"I'm taking your lovely Abuela to church and lunch." I gave her my biggest grin.

"Sí, y tenemos que ir o vamos a llegar tarde." Yes, and we have to go or we'll be late.

"Of course." I replied, opening the door for her. "We'll see you later, Jane."

Jane looked like she wanted to say something, bit with that, we were out the door and heading towards my car. The service went well. Alba seemed to like having me there. After the service she introduced me to what felt like the entire congregation. Everyone seemed to be Alba's friend. As we got in the car I turned to her. After speaking Spanish for two hours, it felt like we were both speaking English.

"I had no idea how popular you are." I said, starting the car.

She smiled and nodded. "Not popular. Blessed with a close church family. You and Jane will have the same in time."

"We will." I said confidently. "I've been taking classes to get confirmed. Don't tell Jane. I want to surprise her."

"Oh, Rafael! That's wonderful. You'll have a full mass, then."

We pulled up at the restaurant, and were quiet as we were seated and as we ordered.

"So this has been a lovely morning." Alba said, before taking a bite of her food.

"I've really enjoyed myself this morning. But I did have an ulterior motive for asking you here."

Alba smiled. "It's about time. You've had my blessing since Thanksgiving."

I blinked. "That was easy. Thank you. I'm always amazed by your faith in me."

"Some people say you're the fantasy. But I think you're kind, generous, and stable. You're the obvious choice. I look forward to having a grandson." She nodded.

"Thank you, Alba."

"Once you're engaged, I'm Abuela."

"Of course." I replied. "Do you want to see the ring?"

She looked excited. "Yes! Let me see."

I pulled out the box and opened it. "Oh, Rafael! It's beautiful. She'll love it."

"I hope so." I replied. "It didn't go so well last time."

There was a fleeting twinkle in Alba's eye. "This isn't last time."

"It's not." I agreed. I told her about my proposal plans as we ate, and she told me the story of how her husband had proposed to her on the way back to her house.

We were laughing as we made our way to the front door. "Abuela, one more thing."

"Yes?"

"The in law suite? It's for you. I'd like you to live with us when you're done living here. Whenever that is."

"I don't want to interfere in your marriage." She demurred.

"It doesn't have to be tomorrow, it's whenever you want. Family is so important to Jane, and to me. We would both love having an ancestral home with you."

She put her hand on my arm. "Thank you, Rafael. I would love that. When the house is too empty for me."

The door opened in front of us. "What are you two doing out here?" Jane asked.

"Just talking." I said with a grin. "Did you miss us?"

Jane rolled her eyes as we followed her inside. Alba launched into the story of all the people I met at church, what all their reactions were, and how the service went while I played with Mateo.

After a few hours, I had to leave. There was an event for me to oversee at the hotel.

"I'll walk you out." Xiomara said, surprising me. Her smile seemed tight.

"Thank you." I replied politely, opening the door for her. We walked in silence to my car. She was going to say no. My heart dropped. How long would it take to get her approval? Would I ever get it? She looked down. "You have my blessing."

I stared at her, not understanding. "What? Why? I mean, I'm ecstatic. Thank you. But you seemed-"

"Unconvinced." Xiomara supplied. "I'm not sure you're right for Jane. But you make her happy. I can't stand in the way of that."

"Thank you. Thank you so much." I said, but she was already walking back to the house. It wasn't the blessing I'd been hoping for, but it was her permission. It was good enough for now.

Two weeks later it was here. The day was finally here. The construction was complete, and the house had been professionally cleaned. I was wearing the light grey suit Jane liked, and the ring was in my pocket.

I picked her up at six. "Have you seen it, yet?" She asked, getting into the car.

"Just for a quality assurance walk through." I replied. "Not to appreciate it."

"You must be so excited!" Jane exclaimed, rubbing my arm.

"I am." I replied. "You look pretty excited yourself."

"I am." She replied. "What are the chances they would finish it on Valentine's Day?"

Well, a ten thousand dollar bonus had certainly motivated them, but I kept that to myself. I pulled the car up in front of the house and we got out.

"Are you ready?" I asked, catching her hand in mine.

"Of course." She said, kissing me lightly on the lips. I opened the front door, revealing the new floors and paint. "Wow." Jane breathed next to me. "It's beautiful."

"Isn't it? I knew you'd pick well. Let's check upstairs first." Two bedrooms were now neutral colored guest rooms. "Should we ever decide to have more, we can repaint then."

Jane looked at me quizzically. "Would you want more?"

I shrugged. "I think so. We'd need to adopt or find a donor, and you'd have to be on board. But I love being a father."

"You're an amazing father." She smiled at me, nibbling on her lip. "I like having more kids on the table. In the future. When I'm published and done school."

I smiled at her. "Done." We went to the next bedroom.

"Rafael!" Jane gasped, marveling at the jungle themed mural on the walls. "Look at this! It's amazing. You're amazing."

"I'm glad you like it." I said, wrapping my arms around her waist and kissing her on the cheek. As she turned to kiss me back, I let her go. "We can't get distracted, remember? We have a dinner reservation."

Jane sighed. "Okay, you're right. Let's see the aquarium bathroom. I hope it didn't change too much, I really-" As we walked into the bathroom, she drew a breath in. "It's exactly the same!"

"Of course." I responded. "It made you happy, and Mateo's going to love it. I want you both to be happy."

She kissed me on my cheek as we passed what would be the twins' room, a pink room with a pink ceiling fan that had a pink chandelier attached to it. Jane laughed. "Not all girls like pink, you know."

"Call it an homage to the original character of the house. Besides, if they don't like it, they're the childen of Petra and Zaz. They'll somehow smuggle in paint, repaint it, then convince everyone that was always the color."

Jane laughed. "You're going to have your hands full."

"We're going to have our hands full." I corrected, kissing her.

We finished walking the hall down to the master bedroom, and opened one of the double doors. The walls in the master were eggplant, making the room feel intimate. Jane and I looked at the his and hers closets, appreciating the design.

I opened the door to the bathroom, hoping Jane would like what I'd chosen. She grabbed my arm. "Look at this place!" Gone were the pink chandeliers and the mirrored jacuzzi, instead the room was done in a Caribbean sand colored marble. The shower was glass enclosed, probably big enough for six. There was an excessive three showerheads. The jacuzzi was replaced by an oversized claw footed tub custom made from the same marble as the floors.

"Do you like it?" I asked as Jane walked into the room.

"Like it?" Jane breathed. "It's incredible! It should be featured on a design show!"

I smiled, kissing her chastely. "Are you ready to look at downstairs?" She nodded, biting her lip. I wondered if she was anxious about something. I cleared my worries from my mind as we got back to the main floor.

We wandered through the living room and dining room, marveling at the difference the floors and wall colors made.

"Rafael, look at the kitchen!" Jane gushed. "I can't believe you get to eat here! It's so beautiful." She lovingly stroked the quartz counter top of the island.

"Thanks to you." I murmured, lifting her hand to my mouth. Her eyes darkened with desire. "Come on, two rooms left."

Jane furrowed her brow. "Two?" I ignored the question, and dragged her in to see the in law suite. "Cherry." She said with that small smile of hers. "For Abuela. That's so thoughtful."

"I try." I said, forcing down the lump that was trying to stick to my throat. My nerves were finally arriving in full force. I ran a hand through my hair, before taking a deep breath. I put my hands on her shoulders. "Turn around." I murmured.

She did, and she saw the doors for the first time. She raised an eyebrow. "I don't remember seeing that there." She walked out of the in law suite, and grabbed the knob. The doors were heavy, actual Victorian antique. She pushed one open with a questioning look and we stepped in. I closed the door behind us as she stared at the dimly lit room in front of her.

There was an enormous dark cherry desk on dark cherry floors. Two entire walls were completely covered by built in shelving, which I had partially filled with Jane's favorite novels. The third wall was almost completely taken over by an enormous bay window, and the walls were crimson.

Jane turned to say something to me, but stopped. Behind me was an entire wall of white camellias. She stood there, gaping, as I got down on one knee.

"Jane, I've put a lot of thought into this. Today is 365 days that we've been together. I went back through the calendar and counted each and every day. So happy anniversary. Back in November, I told you I wanted you at your worst more than anyone else at their best. The week before I decided that I would do anything to get you back. Then, like a sign, this house was for sale. I bought it planning this proposal, knowing how perfect this writing room would be for you, hoping we would live in it as a family. I even had the in law suite renovated with the assumption that Abuela would come live here some day. Jane, I love you. I want forever with you, I want to spend the rest of my life making you happy. I told you once that I've never felt this way about anyone before, and that's terrifying, in the best way. You make me feel alive, happier than I've ever felt, happier than anyone has any right to be. Jane, you are the most kind, generous, wonderful woman I've ever had the good fortune to accidentally impregnate." I pulled the box from my pocket, opening it to reveal the ring inside. The reasonably sized center stone was surrounded by three bands with pave diamonds that became one band at the bottom. "I knew this was made for you the second I saw it. The three bands becoming one represent the Trinity in marriage, you, God, and I making a promise to each other. Jane, will you marry me?"

"Yes! Yes! Of course!" Jane was giddy, almost shaking as I slid the ring onto her finger. I couldn't tell if she was laughing or crying. Then she launched herself into my arms, kissing me deeply.

"Thank you." I muttered against her lips. "I had to beg three people for permission to marry you."

Jane laughed, running her hands against my back. "Who gave you the hardest time?"

I kissed her soundly again. "Your mother. She initially asked for more time to think about it. Then almost a month later, about two weeks ago, she gave me permission."

"Well it's a good thing you asked me to grab your cufflinks, then." Jane teased, running her hands through my hair. Suddenly everything crystallized in my mind.

"You looked in the wrong drawer and saw the ring box?"

She smiled. "I wasn't sure. I mean, it could have been earrings or just an empty box you came across. I didn't open it. But I was so excited I could barely control myself. I texted Ma a picture right away. And the next week I think it was all I could talk about!"

I smiled and kissed her again. "Well thank you for getting me your mother's blessing."

"Well thank you for asking her. For asking all of them. It really means a lot."

"I'd do anything for you." I replied. "I love you."

"And I love you." She replied. "Now can we fool around?"

I kissed her again. I couldn't keep my lips off her. "I wish." I replied. "Everyone we've ever met is at the hotel waiting for us to show up and celebrate our engagement."

Jane grinned, the little wicked smile I'd been seeing more of recently. "Tonight, then. You and I are having a sleep over."

I took a deep breath in. Only three more months.

A/n: Eight chapters to find out the secret room is a glorified office. That happened. XD

If anyone is interested, Jane's ring is the Cartier Trinity Ruban. I did a garbage job describing it! -K


	9. Chapter 9

I woke up the next morning with Jane next to me. I couldn't believe it was real. I watched her quietly breathe in and out, looked at her left hand. The platinum gleamed in the early morning light, the diamonds sparkled. I couldn't believe she'd said yes. I couldn't believe how happy I was. My chest felt warm, my heart felt light. Everything was so perfect. In three months, this beautiful woman would be my wife.

"What are you thinking about?" Jane murmured sleepily, cracking open an eye.

"You." I said, entwining my fingers with hers. "I love you." She kissed me softly. It was warm and inviting, sending a rush through me. She scooted closer to me, and deepened the kiss. I put my free hand on her knee, then slowly slid it up her thigh, over her hip, against her breast, then cupped her face. She made a quiet moaning noise. "Shh." I teased.

She looked me in the eyes, smirked, then pushed me on my back and straddled me. The next thing I knew her mouth was on mine again, hot and frantic. Her hands were in my hair, her chest was pressed to mine. I ran both my hands down her back, before grabbing her bottom and running my hands up and down her tantalizingly spread thighs.

"I want you so much." She whispered in my ear. "I'm aching for you." I moaned a little as she moved her hips against mine for a moment. "Shh." She teased. "Remember?"

Remember?

Last night came rushing back to me.

"Thanks again, Cheppa. Good night!" Jane called, while grabbing my hand and dragging me into her room. We were both a little tipsy, our blood running hot with our new engagement.

The party had been fantastic, well attended and fun. We'd laughed and danced, teasing one another with furtive touches. By the time we arrived back at Abuela's, I needed her. Mercifully Cheppa had put Mateo to sleep in Xiomara's room, and Abuela had gone straight to bed.

The second we stepped into her room, Jane threw herself into my arms, melting her mouth to mine. Her hands were running over my back, my chest, frantic to touch me. I lifted her into my arms, then deposited her onto the bed.

"We can't!" I whispered. "Abuela is right down the hall!"

Jane pouted. "You said we could fool around. I want you."

Maybe we'd had more to drink than I was currently capable of remembering. "Come on, let's put on our pajamas." I winked at her, before slowly peeling off my suit and button down, replacing them with a thin pair of pajama pants.

Jane stared, before her mouth turned into a smirk. She unzipped her dress, then dropped it by the side of the bed. "I guess I'll be going to bed like this, then." She said, very matter of fact, laying there in her hot pink push up bra and matching panties.

I walked over to her and made the critical mistake of touching her hip. My mouth went dry, my erection took over my thinking. The next thing I knew I was above her, my mouth was on hers, my hands running over her nearly bare bottom. Jane moaned, her hands rubbing against my naked chest and abs.

"Whatever you want." She murmured desperately, before kissing me again.

I nodded. No penetration was the only rule tonight.

I took a deep breath, before burying my face in her cleavage. I ran my hands over her body, hooking my fingers on her panties. I kissed back from her bosom to her neck.

"I'd like to pleasure you with my mouth." I blurted out. Suave, Rafael.

To my surprise, she nodded emphatically. "Yes. Okay. Please." I kissed her on her mouth once more, before trailing my mouth down her throat, past her heaving breasts. I dragged the panties down her legs, then tossed them.

My mouth continued its burning trail downward, over her flat stomach. I laid between her legs, my hands holding on to her sides. "Are you sure?" I whispered huskily, finding her eyes with mine.

"Yes! Please, yes." She moaned.

"I don't want you to regret this in the morning, and-"

"Rafael! I want this. I need this."

She could be very persuasive, especially like this with her legs thrown over my shoulders. Slowly I lowered my head, showering her thighs with light kisses. She moaned and arched her hips higher. Tentatively I ran my tongue down her feminine folds, stopping just before her clit.

Jane buried her hands in my hair, panting. I circled my tongue around it a few times, thoroughly enjoying the noises escaping my writhing fiancée. Finally I began to lave her clitoris with quick, short strokes. She gasped and muffled a moan. I reached a hand up to her breast, lightly caressing it, teasing her nipple in time with my tongue.

Her entire body was tight and trembling before me, nearing the precipice. I slowed down, running my tongue against her harder, letting the momentum build. Soon she started chanting my name, gasping and calling it louder and louder until she came, shaking and gripping my head with her thighs.

Her breathing was still erratic when she untangled herself from me and pushed me onto my back, taking my erection firmly into her grasp as she straddled me. She looked like a wonton goddess, and she would be mine in May.

She was clearly a quick study, because the hand job was easily the best I'd ever had. It was firm, confident, and each stroke had me groaning, closer to release. She licked her lips while staring at my hardened member and finally I couldn't hold back. The pleasure overtook me and I came hard and fast, calling her name much louder than the whisper I had intended.

"I can't sleep like this." Jane muttered, satisfied and mellow. She unclasped her bra and tossed it to the corner of the room, where a green light was shining brightly.

"Jane. The baby monitor is on!" I whispered, frantically pulling the covers over us.

"I remember." I replied, coming back from my reverie. "I also remember that we left the baby monitor on last night."

Jane whipped her head over to the corner of the room, where a green light confirmed I was right. Why hasn't we turned it off last night? She muffled a squeak, before rolling off of me and retreating to the opposite edge of the bed. "Do you think anyone saw?" She whispered.

I couldn't help it, I started to laugh. "No one is throwing me out, so probably not!" I fished around for my pajama bottoms at the foot of the bed under the blanket, and pulled them back on. Jane didn't move.

"Can you grab me some clothes?" She moaned quietly. "And I don't know where my panties are."

I grinned at her, getting out of bed. "Last night was a great." I grabbed her a shirt, then found her shorts and brought them to her, kissing her tenderly as I handed them over. "I'm going to grab some coffee."

I pulled on my undershirt from last night, then went out to the kitchen.

Jane

I laid back onto my pillows, biting my lip. I could still feel his hands, his mouth on my body. I looked at the enormous, sparkling ring on my finger. I couldn't believe I was engaged. I turned to look at where Rafael had laid last night. Soon I could wake up to him next to me every morning, in our bedroom in our house. I couldn't help a small squeal of joy.

I heard steps in the hall, and quickly pulled on my shorts and shirt. Just as I was sitting up and brushing my hair, Ma opened the door with Mateo in her arms, laughing.

"Rafael is helping make breakfast. You have to see it!"

Her laugh rubbed me the wrong way. She was holding our son, laughing about my fiancé. I hoped I was just being sensitive. "I'm sure Daddy is doing great. Right, Mateo?"

We all walked back to the kitchen together, where Rafael was flipping pancakes. Abuela patted him on the shoulder.

"Jane puede cocinar los huevos, se puede hacer panqueques. Junto va a crear un buen desayuno." Jane can cook eggs, you can make pancakes. Together you will create a fine breakfast.

I laughed and wrapped my arms around her. "Abuela, thank you." I kissed her on her cheek, then turned to Rafael. "Since when can you make pancakes?"

"She said making pancakes aren't that different from making steak." Rafael said with one of his dazzling smiles and a shrug. He kissed me on the cheek. It was amazing to me how he always seemed so natural. Even under pressure, he was unflinchingly calm, at ease. I knew it wasn't true, but it almost seemed like everything was effortless to him. He exuded confidence in all situations.

"So, have you thought about a date?" Rogelio asked.

"I'd like to get married in May, but it's really up to Jane." Rafael threw out, back to flipping pancakes. "Then we can get the house furnished before we move in."

"That soon?" Ma asked. "Let's not rush."

"No mañana, Xiomara. Es práctico." It's not tomorrow, Xiomara. It's practical.

Once again I thanked God for Abuela and her affinity for Rafael. "May sounds great. Mateo's birthday is the fourth, Mother's Day is the eighth. How about the fourteenth?"

"I think," Rafael paused to kiss me quickly. "We have an official wedding date. Have you thought about a big or small wedding? Or where you'd like to have it?"

I thought for a moment. "Family and friends. I'd like to get married under our tree, if the priest will agree to it, and have the reception on the beach." The logistics seemed difficult. "Can we do that?"

"Of course." He said. "I can start filing for permits tomorrow."

Once again my heart swelled with love for him.

One week later, I had my dress appointment. Lena, Rogelio, Ma, and Abuela came with me.

"Okay, here's the game plan. I want you each to pick out one dress. Then after that, it's all the consultant's choice." I told them, before going into the changing room.

Everyone nodded, then dispersed into the clouds of white dresses. I peeked at my phone while they picked dresses.

Good luck today. I love you.

A text from Rafael.

I can't wait to marry you. Love you, too.

"I know that smile." Said my bubbly consultant as she dragged in the dresses with her. "No sending him pictures!"

I smiled back at her, dubiously eyeing the pile. "Oh, boy. How did they do?"

"They have great taste." She assured me. "Let's start with your friend's choice."

She pulled a tight mermaid dress with a tiered lace skirt and heavy beading off its hanger. After laboriously fastening it to my body, we went out to check my reflection and show everyone.

"You look hot." Lena nodded.

"You do." Ma agreed, pursing her lips. "Do you like it?"

I looked at my reflection. It was flattering, but overtly sexy. "It's gorgeous. But I couldn't imagine wearing it in front of a priest." I responded, poking the corset style bodice and the molded cups.

The consultant clapped. "Next dress, then!" She ushered me back to the changing room and helped me out of it. "Let's change directions, shall we?"

She pulled a tulle gown with a lace bodice and lace off the shoulder sleeves. It was romantic, but it also looked like something I would put one of my characters in.

"Ah, Jane!" Abuela exclaimed as we entered the room and I took my spot on the podium. "Te ves como una princesa. Ese vestido como el mío, cuando me casé con tu abuelo." You look like a princess. That dress looks like mine, when I married your grandfather.

"Yeah, it looks like it's about that old. No offense." Ma replied, directing the last part at the consultant, who shrugged.

"You do look like a princess. But maybe a more modern one?" Rogelio suggested humbly.

"Jane?" The consultant prompted.

"I really think I need something more modern. Especially considering our story."

Abuela nodded. "Lo importante es que usted es feliz." The important thing is that you're happy.

We went back to the dressing room, where I changed again. This one was much more modern, slim fitting, sleeveless with a V neck, and covered with stunning lace.

"I really like this one." I said, getting on the podium and doing a little turn.

"I knew you'd like it." Ma said with a little smile.

"It's definitely cute." Lena agreed. "I wish it were maybe more grand?"

Alba nodded in assent. "Sólo se tiene una vestido de novia. Debe ser genial." You only get one wedding dress. It should be grand.

I noticed Rogelio's beaming smile from the corner of my eye. "I agree. I love it, it just needs more drama." I replied. "Dad, do you have an opinion?"

"No, not yet." He said, schooling his face back to a neutral expression.

"Okay!" The consultant chimed in. "Next dress!" We went back in the room, and took it off. "Close your eyes." She said conspiratorially. "I think your Dad picked your dress."

"Really? Rogelio?" I was surprised, but complied. I felt her put the dress on over my head, as light as air. She led me out, eyes still closed, to the podium. Immediately I heard my family.

"Oh, Jane!" Ma and Abuela gasped at the same time. The consultant turned me to the mirror.

"Open your eyes." Rogelio said by my ear.

It was stunning. It was light and airy organza with a full ball gown skirt delicately swelling from the natural waist. The bodice was sleeveless and V necked, and the entire gown was covered with incredible lace appliqués.

"I love it." I choked out. "Dad, it's perfect." I reached for him, pulling him into a hug.

"When I first told you I was your father, you were wearing a wedding dress. Now here we are, almost two years later, and I can't imagine life without you. I'm so happy I get to be here for this part of your life. Please let me buy your dress. I'm sure you'll want your mother to escort you down the aisle. Let this be my contribution."

"Oh, Dad." I squeezed him tighter. "Mom didn't tell you? I want both of you to escort me. Together." Finally we let go and wiped our eyes.

"So is this the dress?" The consultant asked.

"Yes! Absolutely!" I replied.

Three months until I got to wear it again. I was already counting the days.

A/n: IMPORTANT: THE RATING WILL GO UP TO AN M NEXT CHAPTER, SO DON'T FORGET TO CHANGE THE DEFAULT SEARCH SETTINGS OR YOU WON'T SEE THE NEXT CHAPTER! (It only shows up to T ratings!)

So many dresses! I had so much fun picking dresses for her to try on in my head. Can you believe only two more chapters?

Lena's dress choice was Pnina Tornai "4143"

Xiomara's dress, was Oscar de la Renta "Drew"

Alba's dress choice was Reem Acra "Ilsa"

The dress Jane picked, Rogelio's choice, was Jorge Manuel "Lace"


	10. Chapter 10

I couldn't sleep. I watched the numbers on the clock ticking by, three, four, five in the morning. The room was empty of my personal belongings, save my tuxedo for later. Everything else had been moved to the house. At five fifteen I gave up and went to read the paper in the living room. Nothing of interest. After ten minutes the door opened.

"I knew you would be up." Luisa said, handing me a cup of coffee. "Are you excited?"

"Yeah." I said with a little smile. "Thanks."

"I wish Dad could be here. He'd be really proud, Raf." She put her hand on my shoulder. "A perfect grandson, the hotel is doing amazing, getting married."

"I can't really imagine him approving of me." I said, taking a sip of coffee. "Though he'd probably like Jane. Right? Everyone likes Jane."

Luisa laughed. "I don't know. Think about it! He liked my mother who left me, Rose who was a drug lord, and your mother, which speaks for itself. Not to mention he liked Petra. I bet he wouldn't like her."

For whatever reason, her dark humor lifted my spirits. He was a poor judge of character for someone in business. Maybe it even applied to me. Maybe it was why he loved Lachlan and never seemed to like me. "Thanks, Luisa. You're a great best woman."

She shrugged. "I am pretty good." After a small pause, she continued earnestly. "I'm really happy for you, you know. I know you've had it pretty hard, no matter how flippant you were about it. I'm glad you're finally happy."

I hugged her. "I hope I get to see you this happy with someone, too." I murmured to her.

A painfully long eight hours later I was standing at the alter in my tuxedo, waiting for Jane. The priest would only marry us in his church, so we were talking pictures by the tree later. The organ music swelled with the start of the processional. Down the aisle came Abuela and Rogelio's parents, escorted by my sister who then came and stood next to me. Next was Lena, carrying Mateo with his basket of toys. The music changed and got louder, everyone stood.

Jane appeared in the doorway standing between her parents, clutching a bouquet of those white camellias she and Abuela were so fond of. An elbow length veil covered her head, and she was in a magnificent dress. She slowly came down the aisle, her eyes never leaving mine.

"And who gives this woman?" The priest asked. With that, the ceremony began. It was a strange feeling, like it was moving so fast and so slow at the same time. It felt like the mass was six hours long, but before I knew it we were saying our vows.

"I, Rafael Solano, take thee, Jane Glorianna Villenueva, for better or worse" I squeezed her hand. "For richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, from this day forward."

The priest smiled. "Then I would like to present to you for the first time as husband and wife, Mr and Mrs Villenueva. You may kiss your bride!"

I quickly pulled back her veil, wrapped my arms around her, and kissed her. Our relationship flashed through my mind, from our first meeting to now. Seeing her at the Golden Harbour Yacht Club, kissing her, confronting her about the pregnancy, kissing her again, breaking up, kissing in the pool, breaking up again, winning her back. Getting engaged. Now here we were, kissing at our wedding.

"I love you. Thank you." I murmured as we finally pulled apart to walk back down the aisle.

"I love you. For what?" She asked, beaming.

"Marrying me." I said, kissing her again.

The next two hours was a blur of photography; family photos, posed photos, pictures of us kissing by the tree. Finally we made our entrance to the reception.

There was seating on a patio overlooking the beach, where dinner would shortly be served. The band was set up nearby, and there was a canopy of twinkling fairy lights strung for dancing on the sand.

Jane was immediately pulled away to talk to some friends, and Xiomara appeared by my side, drink in hand. "You took her name? I'm surprised."

I carefully schooled my face into a smile. "It made sense. Jane is closer to you and Abuela than I am to my family." I paused. "And Mateo's last name is Villenueva, so we would have had to change two names instead of one. It was the obvious choice."

She let out a short laugh. "I'm sure convenience was a great motivator."

I furrowed my eyebrows. "And what exactly does that mean?"

She shrugged. "Nothing, nothing at all."

Obviously that was bull, it was clearly a dig at how I fell in love with the woman caring my child, at our instant family. I let a deep breath out and grabbed a glass of champagne off a passing tray. Then the event coordinator announced it was time for dinner and thankfully I was able to escape.

Dinner went smoothly, the food was impeccable. Before long it was time for the toasts, cake cutting, and first dance. I stood first, addressing everyone.

"Thank you all so much for coming. We considered doing toasts, but ultimately decided everyone would rather dance than listen to us. You're the most important people in our lives, and we're honored you could make it."

There was some polite clapping while we cut the cake, carefully feeding one another. Then the music started, and our first dance began.

The hours passed quickly while we danced; it felt like five minutes between our first dance and when the event coordinator gave me the warning that it was almost time to clear out. I went to find Jane, who was coming back from the indoor ladies' room.

"Are you ready?" I asked. "It's already ten."

"Yeah." She smiled, but I could tell she was nervous. "Let me just say good bye."

"Don't worry." I said, taking her hand in mine. "I have a surprise for you."

I had organized a grand exit for us. We walked back to the party, where Jane was surprised to find everyone holding a sparkler, standing in a line. One by one we said good bye to our guests, thanking then for coming. As we progressed down the line, the limousine that would be taking us back to our house came into view. Finally there were only three people left in the line.

Xiomara wrapped Jane in her arms. "I can't believe my baby is married. Good luck." It was tender and honest, the most motherly thing I'd ever heard her say.

Next in line was Rogelio, who kissed her on the cheek. "I couldn't imagine a more beautiful daughter. I love you."

Jane teared up. "Thanks, Dad. We'll see you tomorrow before we leave."

Finally there was Alba. "Mi Jane. No puedo expresar lo orgulloso que estoy de ti, lo feliz que me haces. Ahora ve- Lo que se dice Xiomara? Puede enroscarse con gusto!" My Jane. I can't express how proud I am of you, how happy you've made me. Now go-What is it Xiomara says? Bang him with gusto!

Jane laughed, kissing her on the cheek before turning to me and melting her mouth against mine. Calls and whistles rang out as we got in the limo and took one last look, before heading towards home.

"Abuela likes her champagne." I laughed. "What was your favorite part of the day?"

She smiled again, clutching my hand. "So far? Our first kiss. But there's still an hour and a half left in the day."

I raised an eyebrow. "You seem a little tense about that. It's fine if you're not ready yet. There's other things we can do."

She shook her head emphatically. "No, I'm ready. I've been ready for a long time. I need you. I want you."

We pulled up outside the house just then. I slipped the driver an enormous tip, before helping Jane with her dress. We went up the front walk together, and I unlocked the front door.

"Welcome home." I murmured to her, before lifting her into my arms. She wrapped her arms around my neck before laughing in delight. I carried her over the threshold, then closed the door with my foot and kicked off my shoes.

"Are you going to put me down?" She asked.

"No." I replied, before heading up the stairs. "I'm going to carry you all the way to our marital bed."

I walked down the hall, across the threshold of our bedroom, then gently put her down next to the bed. I took both her hands in mine, then stood back, just looking at her.

"You're really beautiful." I said honestly. "I don't tell you enough. Thank you for marrying me. Thank you for being you."

She bit her lip. "You're very amorous."

"I am." I agreed. "I just got to marry my soul mate. I've never been so happy." I rested my hands on her waist, admiring her. I pulled her to me, gently rubbing her back, and our lips met.

Electricity crackled between us, the blood heated in my veins. She wrapped her arms around my neck, then briefly broke the kiss. "Unzip me. I'm ready."

I nodded, then caught her mouth with mine again. Slowly I dragged down the zipper, exposing something white underneath. Jane lowered her arms, letting the dress slip from her shoulders to the floor. She was wearing a white silk teddy that ended just below her bottom and almost totally exposed her breasts. On her thigh was a garter. "Wow." I breathed.

"Wait until you see what I have for next week." She hinted, pulling off my tuxedo jacket and starting the buttons on my shirt. I untied my bowtie and unfastened my cufflinks as she started pulling at my belt. "Now we're even." She said as my trousers dropped to the floor and I pulled off my shirt.

I reached out, holding her head in my hands. Slowly I brought her face to mine for a deep, lingering kiss. I ran my hands over her body, felt the warmth emanating from her skin. Then she nearly jumped into my arms, wrapping her arms and legs around me.

I walked us over to the bed, laying her down and covering her body with my own. Her breasts came spilling out from her lingerie, impossibly erotic. I broke our kiss, dropping my head to her bosom and lavishing her nipples with attention. I ran my hands up and down her thighs, over her slick folds.

"Please." She begged. "Please. I need you. I need more."

"Are you sure?" I asked, rubbing a finger lightly near her opening.

"Yes!" She called out, arching her hips towards me once more. Slowly I slid my finger inside her, gently rubbing. "Oh, Raf!" She called out.

I gently added a second finger, going back to playing with her breasts with my mouth. Her body was growing tight beneath mine, her moans louder. Her hands gripped my shoulders as her body clenched around my fingers, and she shouted through her orgasm.

She looked amazing, covered in a thin sheen of sweat, panting, exposed, well pleasured. My erection was painful against my boxers, I'd never been so hard. "Was it worth the wait?" I asked her.

Her eyes met mine. "That's not what I waited for. Hope many times do I have to beg for you to make love to me?"

She pulled my mouth to hers as I pulled her lingerie off over her head. She pushed down my boxers and wrapped her legs around me, bringing me closer to her core. I pushed the tip of my hardness against her slick, swollen folds.

"I love you." I told her.

"I love you, too." She whispered back, and our mouths met once more. Slowly I entered her, sinking my cock into the warm depths of her sex.

And Jane was a Virgin no more.

She felt incredible. So hot, so wet, gripping me tightly. Finally I was completely sheathed in her. "Are you okay?" I asked.

"Okay? This is the best I've ever felt ever. Don't stop. Don't ever stop!"

Her nails scored my back as they raked across it. Slowly I pulled out, then surged back into her. She moaned loudly, flexing her hips to meet my thrust. She was amazing, everything I could have ever imagined and more. I'd never felt so connected to someone. Her head was thrown back in ecstasy, and she was making obscene moaning noises as I drove in and out of her.

The pressure was mounting for both of us, I could feel it in the way she trembled, in the way she tightened around me. It was good, I wasn't sure how long I could hold out for. It had been so long since I'd had sex, and here was this erotic goddess who was writhing beneath me, calling my name. I plunged into her again and again, deeper and harder.

"Oh, Rafael, Rafael!" She called out, pulling my face to hers, our mouths colliding as she came again. Her muscles clenched around me like a vice, and I couldn't hold on any longer, thrusting desperately and deeply into her as I came, pouring myself into her.

We laid there for a long moment before I moved to lay beside her, taking her into my arms, kissing her cheek.

"Are you okay?" I asked softly.

She was still breathing raggedly. "Yeah. That was, well, wow." She nuzzled close to me. "I get it now. I get what the big deal is."

"So was it worth waiting for?" I teased.

"Yeah." She replied sleepily. "I think it was."

Her eyelids drooped, but she fought valiantly to stay awake. I kissed the top of her head. "Go to sleep."

I swear I could see her blush in the dim light of the bedroom. "It's stupid, it's just..." She paused for a moment, burying her face into my neck. "I don't want today to end."

"Hey." I gently tilted her head up, so she was looking in my eyes. "Today was incredible. But we have our whole lives ahead of us. I love you, and I can't wait to wake up tomorrow next to my wife."

I kissed her, and she smiled, then laid back and closed her eyes. "You're right." She said. "Goodnight, husband."

I held her tighter. "Goodnight, wife."

A/n: How did you guys like Rafael changing his last name? I just can't imagine Jane not being a Villenueva.

Next chapter is some serious PWP on their honeymoon and either an epilogue or a teaser for my next Jafael fic! We'll just have to see how it goes. -K


	11. Chapter 11

"I can't believe it's been seven days already!" Jane exclaimed over the dinner we'd made together.

I raised my glass of wine. "To one week of marriage."

She smiled, lightly touching her glass to mine. "To one week of the privileges that come with it."

We were back in our own kitchen after five days in England, doing a tour of all Jane's favorite romance writers and their lives. We looked at their houses, visited their graves and the song of their stories. At night we went to bed early and stayed up late, making up for lost time.

I'd discovered an all new appreciation for my gorgeous wife on our honeymoon. Her mouth was filthy in bed, she always knew exactly what to say. Being a writer apparently also meant that she was creative with positions and not afraid to try something new. And she always told me exactly what she wanted, moaned in a voice that would tempt an angel.

Our plane had landed a few hours ago, and we would be picking Mateo up in the morning. For tonight, it was still just us. I put down my wine glass, wrapped an arm around her waist. "I have a surprise for you." I murmured in her ear.

"And what's that?" She asked, unbuttoning the top few buttons of my shirt with a smirk.

"Come see." I invited, guiding her to the back deck. I opened the door and a motion sensor turned on some small footlights leading to our new pool. An elevated stone hot tub spilled into it like a waterfall. Though the entire back yard was encircled with a nine foot tall privacy fence, there was another four foot tall fence surrounding just the pool.

"It's amazing!" Jane gasped.

"And child safe." I whispered in her ear, watching her shiver. "Feel like a swim?"

A grin spread across her face as she unzipped the side of her dress. "Only if we can go skinny dipping again."

"I hoped you'd say that." I said, holding her waist in my hands. I peeled her dress off her shoulders, down her arms, until it was a puddle by her feet.

She made quick work of the buttons on my shirt, nimbly unbuttoning them. I admired her gorgeous body and luscious curves, all presented to me in lacy black lingerie. As she got to work on my belly she turned her face up, her lips an offering to mine. I kissed her deeply, running my hands through her hair. Then she pulled away.

"How about a little role play?" She asked, pulling off her shoes and getting into the water.

"Find by me." I answered, kicking off my shoes and pants.

She stood at the other end of the pool and unclipped her bra, throwing it near her dress. I entered the water then removed my boxer briefs, tossing it in the pile and swimming closer to her. Then she pulled off her panties, smiling at me.

She threw them onto a chair, never breaking eye contact. For a moment we just stared at one another, then we were in one another's arms, our lips crushed together.

She ran her hands through my hair, I skimmed mine over her back, grabbing her curvaceous bottom. I pulled her closer to me, her nipples hardened against my chest, my erection brushing her folds.

"Let's do it. I mean it, I want to." She said, a twinkle in her eye.

"Are you sure?" I asked, my hand caressing her sex.

"Yeah." She moaned, returning her lips to mine.

I plunged a finger inside her, felt her shiver in my arms. She was so hot, so wet. I dragged my mouth from here's to start kissing and biting her neck. I lifted her a little higher, giving me access to her beautiful breasts. I raked one gently with my teeth, laved it with my tongue.

"Rafael!" She moaned, grinding herself against me. I walked us over to the side of the pool.

"Hold on tightly to the ledge." I rasped. My erection was staining between us, and I was more than ready to take her. She nodded, legs still wrapped tightly around my waist.

I slid my hands down to her hips, grabbing them firmly. I aligned my erection with her entrance, and slammed into her.

"Rafael!" She shouted, pulling me closer with her legs.

"Ssh." I reminded her, pulling out and thrusting in deeply again. She nodded, her head rolling back as I plunged in and out of her welcoming body. She was so tight, so impossibly erotic moaning my name over and over.

I dropped my head back to her breasts, suckling as I pushed into her. I brought one of my hands to her clit, lightly putting some pressure on it. Almost immediately I felt her start to tighten around my cock, felt the tremors as her orgasm began.

I thrust in again, harder, faster, and her hands buried themselves in my hair. I pressed down slightly harder on her sensitive nub. Suddenly she was there, moaning wildly, bucking against my erection, riding me like she'd been born to do it.

Her enthusiasm and clenching internal muscles were too much. I thrust one more time, as hard as I could, gritting my teeth as my climax washed over me like a massive wave.

I came hard, staying as quiet as I could. Then we were still, floating pleasantly in the water.

"We should have done this years ago." Jane murmured, satisfied. I just nodded, completely spent.

-Five Years Later-

"Mateo, you're going to love kindergarten! Learning to read and write-"

"Making new friends and playing on the playground!" Rafael interjected, winking at me.

We'd been married for five and a half years, and he still dazzled me sometimes. Like now, as we rode the big kid Kindergarten bus for First Day. He was a glorified big kid himself, playing with Mateo and his future classmates.

My happiness was tempered by nagging nausea. I took another sip from my water bottle hoping to alleviate it, but it didn't help.

"We're here!" The bus driver called. "Everyone off the bus, and your parents will guide you to your class! Have a great First Day, new kindergartners!"

I stood up, and spots danced in front of my eyes. I couldn't help but think as I fainted-

This feels familiar.

The curtain swung back, revealing my urgent care doctor. "Well, we've found the cause of your fainting. Congratulations, you're pregnant!"

My hands reflexively went to clutch my stomach. A miracle.

"That can't be right." Rafael said, brows furrowed. "I'm sterile. Are you sure?"

"Very." The doctor replied. "False negatives are common. False positives are rare. When were you last tested?"

My head was swimming. A miracle. Another baby.

"Two years ago. If she's pregnant, it's not mine." Rafael looked furious, but I could see his hurt right under the surface.

The doctor kept a carefully schooled facial expression. "Well let's do a dating ultrasound, then at twelve weeks we can do a blood based paternity test, if you'd like."

He left to grab the ultrasound machine and tech, and my husband turned to me. "Do you have anything you need to confess?"

"What?" My eyes bugged open. "You think I cheated on you? What have I ever done to deserve that?"

"You're pregnant. I'm sterile." He said flatly. "I'm sure you can understand."

"Ouch. Wow. I understand where you're coming from, but I'm still hurt." I whispered.

"I am, too, Jane. This hurts me, too." Our eyes met, and slowly I reached for his hand. For a moment he stared at it, then he grabbed it and held on tightly.

The ultrasound tech came with her machine a moment later. "Let's see that baby!" She said perkily. The gel was squirted on my belly, and after a few adjustments, there my baby was.

"How does she look?" I asked.

"Beautiful! Too early to tell sex, but you're definitely between thirteen and fourteen weeks. I'm going to put you at thirteen weeks and four days. It's a little late for a nuchal translucency scan, but even that looks very normal."

The three of us watched the baby on the screen. He or she looked like they were dancing, kicking and raising the roof. How could Rafael possibly question this baby was his?

A nurse walked in with a couple of vials. "Jane Villenueva? I'm here for your Materniti21 and your paternity test."

The tech took pictures while the nurse took blood, then the tech handed me the pictures. "Congratulations!" She said on her way out.

"We're done here." Said the nurse. "The doctor will call you in one week with all the results."

The ride home was quiet. We waited for Mateo to get off the bus, made dinner, listened to his million new stories, then we put him to bed like usual.

That night Rafael didn't come to bed. The night after, he said he had to work late. Same the night after that. The next night I found him sleeping in the guest room. On night five I tried to confront him, but there was an 'emergency' at the hotel. Right. On night six I made a plan.

That morning I told him Mateo and I were going to have a sleep over with Rogelio and Ma. He nodded and went on his way. I bided my time, then surprised him that night. He was laying in our bed, staring at the ultrasound picture.

"Rafael, we need to talk."

"We don't. Not until tomorrow." He replied, eyes never leaving the photo.

"We really do." I said. "I gave you space, now we're trying something different. We need to talk about our problems, or we're going to make the same mistakes we did six years ago."

Rafael moved over so I could come lay by him. "Okay. Okay. I don't think you'd cheat. But I know I'm not able to have children. It's been eight or nine years now. So now I'm stuck. I can't accept this child is mine, because what if it isn't? People make mistakes. I could forgive one bad decision on your part. But I keep thinking about Michael. Not that I think you're sleeping with him, what if I become him? What if I resent this pregnancy? What if you leave me for this baby's father?"

"Oh, Raf." I murmured, wrapping his head in my arms, pulling him towards my chest. "Miracles happen. I make plenty of mistakes, but never sleeping with someone else. And I could never leave you for anyone else. I love you so much."

"I know." He whispered. "In my heart, I know. But my head won't listen. I love the twins, but I was never really attached to them while Petra was still pregnant. I can't imagine how much it would hurt to love this child as my own, and find out another child isn't mine."

"I didn't think of the twins. You're right. I see where you're coming from now. But Raf? This baby is yours. You're still my one and only."

He nodded slightly. "Stay with me tonight?"

I laughed softly. "Like I was going to give you another option."

I curled up next to him, and he rested his head on my chest again. "Jane?" He voice was quiet, almost a whisper. "Yes?"

"I love you."

I smiled. "I love you, too."

The next morning, the phone rang.

"Dr. Hillcroft, good to hear from you." I said as Rafael clutched my hand.

"Hello. Well, I won't make you wait. The paternity test confirms that Rafael is the father."

"Thank you, doctor. I knew it would. I'll see you in a few weeks!"

I hit the end button and looked over at my husband. Tears collected in the corners of his eyes. Then he lowered his head so it was against my tiny bump.

"It's a miracle." Rafael whispered against my belly. "I can't believe it. It's a miracle. Jane, I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry. It's a miracle. I couldn't believe I'd ever get this lucky. I'm so sorry. I love you."

Then he kissed me, over and over. Five years ago, his self defeating attitude would have stopped him from waiting for the facts, and my temper would have meant I could never have forgiven him. But it wasn't five years ago. We'd grown and matured, gotten stronger as a couple.

For better or worse, we were in it together.

A/n: Whew! That's it! Hope everyone liked it!

Next up from me is a very steamy character redemption romance about Milos and Petra. -K


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